I haven't posted up here in a while and I feel kind bad, though I doubted you guys missed me that much, ha ha. I thought I'd do a quick post about my writing.

I took a break from writing the gun fic over x-mas. I SO WANT TO GET TO THE END. Seriously this thing is kicking my butt. I wrote a short story that this big fic is based off of and of the original plot I'm only on like.. the second paragraph. It sucks because I'm literally building a relationship from the ground up. I've only done that once or twice before. So I can't really get this fic moving because I need readers to understand why it hurts when the bad thing happens in the third paragraph of the original, because now it's a big fic and you actually see their relationship... UGH! I just wanna get to the deaths!

I don't know why, but like, my writing went from kinda quirky funny to kinda wacky angst death character crud. I dunno which one I like more. The gun fic is kinda a happy medium of the two. Right now it's all 'awww, wuve' and at the end it's gonna be 'AAAH ANGST AND BLOOD'. I still can't believe how long this thing is, I dunno why I can't get over it. Maybe cause it's the longest thing I've written with like... plot. Yes, I love to criticize myself.

As always I've backed myself into that evil horrible corner. Mmmhmmm, the evil corner that is the lemon corner. I really don't want to back out of it again, this'll be about the third or fourth time I ran away from it. I mean, there are 14 year olds out there writing sex scenes and I'm all like "Oh noes, I don't like this I feel uncomfortable!" I'm 18 years old and I know I can do it, and it's kinda important to the plot and I don't wanna pull a Stephanie Meyer waking up pillow-biter thing. Urgh, I wanna get this over with. Just bite the bullet and what not. Hopefully I can battle through it by the end of tonight and get onto the angst. OH HOW I MISS THEE!

So yeah... three chapters not fully done yet = about 17 pages. That's only about to the third paragraph in the orginal? Great. Also because I can't help but think I made their relationship move too fast, I'm going to write a new chapter three where it's just fluff and crud. I WANT PEOPLE TO UNDERSTAND WHY CHAPTER FIVE/SIX IS SAAAAAAAAAD and not be like "So what...".

Anyhoo new icon is of a doll I did for the fic while bored and stuck, it's of Roxas wrapped up in his 82048 layers. I <3 character traits. Now I need to do a chain smoking Axel.