well this story is bout somethin tht happened to me not too long ago.....Well it all starts off bout a year ago. I had met a beautiful girl named Tashia she had got me into anime in no time. When she discovered i lived right down the road from her she kept inviting me over to her house almost every single day. I didnt mind at all i was always ignored till i met her. Anyway she has an evil girl named Jazz she has been Tashia's gf for years. But then bout half a year ago Tashia started calling me less and inviting me less. I thought nothin of it at first but then when she got word Jazz was moving ishe sounded so happy. But i could tell she wasnt happy at all her voice was starting to sound less cheerful and it almost sounded like she could cry at any moment. then 2 months ago Jazz didnt have any control over our local anime club and Tashia is usually the one to take charge and we listen to her. But now tht Jazz has moved in i KNOW tht Jazz is using Tashia to get control not only over the club but also to get everything she dosnt deserve. I keep trying to wake Tashia from this nightmare but she's too brainwashed by her gf to see how much i love her. I told the anime club and almost all agree with me they all encourage me to do my best. I give special thanx to xXHaseos GirlXx who has made 2 music videos for me and Tashia i thank her from the bottom of my heart. But unfortunatly Tashia is ignoring me either cuzz her gf told her not to or she's too damn scared to face the truth i tell. Truthfully i think Tashia would've broke up with her a long time ago cuzz i got my 1st kiss form her and she said she has a crush on me. But the only reason y Tashia's still with Jazz is cuzz Jazz fights drirty always threatening to kill herself if Tashia broke up with her she's also a drama queen and knows how to throw a fit to get Tashia's attention. I dont want Tashia the girl i love more than anything in the world to be used for the rest of her life so anyones got any ideas to help me plz tell me as soon as possible. Im crying juss typing this this plz help me. Some people say to find a new girl. But....when u find someone thts saved ur life many times tht she'll ever know u cant juss give up people who read this letter tell all the people u know to give me advice. I WONT GIVE UP TASHIA.....AND JAZZ ....I WILL NOT FAIL!!!!!!!


I FINALLY GOT TO GO TO TASHIA'S HOUSE!!!!!!......But i didnt kiss her. She showed me new mello vids on youtube she'd laugh and my heart was heavily beating. i kept gazing at her lips as she also read MelloxL fanfics. My head was right next to hers....ha im suprised she couldnt feel some sort of vibe from me. I kept wonderin if i should kiss her, but the fear of rejection followed me. My heart ached knowing i could loose her and i was too scared to show her my feelings.....Why? Why can't i do it? though i gave her the place to see this world so hopefully she'll be on after her sleep. Too bad i forgot to tell her "have a good nap". Hmmmmmmmm i wonder what she's thinkin bout. But at least i got to treasure her voice in my heart again.

wounded heart

Today at school in my English class our assignment was to write down the most memorable moment during the summer. Sad to say it's whats happening to me. I'll try to remember as much as i wrote since i dont have the paper next to me.

I had juss came back from my trip to Alaska. I will admit tht the flight back was cool we flew over a storm tht illuminated the night. Anyway i had juss came down to my friend Tashia's house. There i had gotten my 1st kiss tht made me feel whole. I thought things couldnt get any better....I was right instead things got worse. Her brain washing girl friend (shes bi) was moving in i tried to help Tashia reconsider letting her stay but Jazz threw some dramma to get Tashia's attention. And i havent heard her voice since the last days of July. As if tht wasnt bad enough all my friends tht actually understand me have moved to the carrer center and now im all alone. I also would listen to the Three Days Grace song "gone forever" (which im listening to as i type through my tears)and told myself tht thts what my friends really want to say. Tashia is my heart i treasure closly. There's one line i follow from the movie The Pursuit of Happiness is to not let anyone tell me tht i cant do it. Everyone juss says find a new girl but still no girl makes me feel as complete as Tashia does. My own mom even told me "Chad you need to find a new girl if Tashia was actually pretty then it be a diffrent story." I had to stop myself from yeling "How dare you!!" at her. I wont give up on my happiness...

Thts all i can remember so as i said before anyone who reads this plz help me thank u.

i'll be


I'll be there for you.
I'll be the sheild tht protects u from pain and sorrow.
I'll be the one to hold you when u cry.
You may think u have Jazz but Jazz is using you.
Tashia i love you with every ounce of heart i got.
Plz...*gets down on knees* I love u.

i would

If i could give my soul to u i would.
If i could give my heart to u i would.
If i could give u my life i would.
But you are my life and i love u very much.
I'd give anything to see u smile again.
I love you with all my heart and soul.
I JUSS LOVE U!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Im doing all i can but am getting nowhere. I feel like i cant do it i feel like im nothing. Mabe thts all i am. Cuzz thts all i feel like. So lost in this hell and cant find an escape for me or tashia. I still wont give up i love tashia too much i need to save her. All i feel like is......nothing