Yusuke: WHY AM I WEARING A FREAKIN’ DRESS?
[Yusuke is standing in his bedroom, looking down at a blue and white dress.]
Puu: PUU!
[Small Puu comes waddling into the room.]
Yusuke: What happened to you? You’re small again. And since when do you walk? You always used those big dopey ears to fly.
Puu: Puu.
[Puu trips on an ear and falls down. Yusuke picks up Puu with a confused look.]
Yusuke: Come to think of it, last night was pretty weird… [images fade into flashback] …I said no to the arcades… [images fade back to present] …but if so does that mean? [freak] I did something I shouldn’t have and now I’ve woken up in a place I don’t know how I got here next to someone I don’t know?!?
Chipper Voice: Bingo, bingo! You win the prize!
Yusuke: [under breath] No way…
[Yusuke puts Puu down on the bed and opens the door where blinding colors shine in. Ogres are running everywhere in a frenzy. Yusuke steps outside.]
Yusuke: Well at least I know where I am now.
Chipper Voice: [chuckling]
[I giant pink bubble, that the chuckling is coming from, floats through the air towards Yusuke and pops as it hits the ground, with Botan springing out, floating on an oar.]
Botan: Heehee. Hello!
Yusuke: So what’s up in Spirit World?
Botan: [confused] Spirit World? What’s that?
Yusuke: Enough games. You know very well that’s where you’re from.
Botan: I’m from the Northern Lands.
Yusuke: And where do you call where we are now?
Botan: Ogre-land. Aren’t the ogres that live here so cute?
Yusuke: You got to be kidding me.
Botan: You’re not from around here are you?
Yusuke: [sarcastic] Gee, What was your first clue?
Botan: hmm… [thoughtful] I think you’re skin-tone tipped me off.
[Yusuke anime-falls then gets up with a growl and x-mark on his face.]
Botan: Now calm down. [laughs] The ogres sent word and I came as quick as I could. You ought to be congratulated!
Yusuke: Congratulated? For what?
Botan: For bringing about the death of the nasty Tyrant Akashi!
Yusuke: [lost] When did I do that?
Botan: From what I gather, when you arrived. Look back inside your room.
[Yusuke turns to look back inside the house he came from and in the center of the room is a bed with a blue corpse of Mr. Akashi on top.]
Yusuke: [disgusted] Now how did that happen?
Botan: I believe when your room came crashing down and smashed him.
Yusuke: If I smashed him, then why is he on the inside?
Botan: [shrugs, happy] Must have blown right through your floor! You must be a pretty good wizard to pull that one off!
Yusuke: Wizard? I’m no wizard.
Botan: So you are a witch then? If I were you, I’d consider a title upgrade!
Yusuke: I’m not that either!
Botan: Then what are you?
Yusuke: Delinquent, monster, punk, discharged Spirit Detective…take your pick.
[Botan looks confused then pulls a book from her kimono sleeve. After rummaging through the pages she scans down a page with her finger then stops.]
Botan: hmm…AH! I see. “A Detective—someone who solves mysteries.” We’re in luck then; the Land of Yu has great need of you!
Yusuke: Land of Yu? I don’t know what you’re talking about, but you should look up ‘discharged’ while you’re at it. I’m not solving any more of your cases!
[A sudden boom explodes nearby with lots of smoke. The ogres that have been running all stop and grovel on the ground. The smoke clears to reveal Mr. Iwamoto.]
Botan: [whispering] It looks like the Evil Iwamoto has heard of Tyrant Akashi’s demise as well.
Mr. Iwamoto: What sort of uprising has been going on here? I smell the need of discipline! [sees Yusuke] What have we here? A cockroach?!
Yusuke: Nice to see you again too old man…or not.
Mr. Iwamoto: It looks like I’ll have to teach you some respect!
[Mr. Iwamoto swings a punch at Yusuke who jumps to dodge and lands on the open door. He looks down at Mr. Iwamoto then jumps again, kicking Mr. Iwamoto in the back of his neck. Mr. Iwamoto falls to the ground.]
Yusuke: Sorry. I don’t have time for your lessons.
Mr. Iwamoto: [groans, then sees inside the room] Akashi…the Demon Slippers! They’ll be mine now!
[Mr. Iwamoto crawls over to the bed but Mr. Akashi’s corpse vaporizes as he pulls himself up there. Mr. Iwamoto looks around in shock and pounds the bed in anger.]
Mr. Iwamoto: Where did they go? NO!
Botan: [chuckling] It’s no use, the Demon Slippers already found a new owner.
Mr. Iwamoto: What?!
[Botan points to Yusuke’s feet.]
Botan: There they are and there they’ll stay.
[Botan laughs as an angry Yusuke slides behind her and hits her in the back of the head.]
Yusuke: Well Thank You! Now I have these tacky pumps to remind me I’m STILL in a stupid freakin’ ugly dress!
Botan: YOU JERK! What’s the big idea hitting someone who just saved you!
Yusuke: Saved nothing! You have me dolled up like some little girl. How does that save anyone?!
Mr. Iwamoto: Heh, those slippers are obviously with someone who does not appreciate them. Give them to me, boy!
Yusuke: What? You like drag? Here you can have them!
[Yusuke tries to pull off a Demon Slipper but it won’t budge.]
Botan: I said that’s where they’ll stay.
Yusuke: Great. So you mean I’m stuck with them?
Mr. Iwamoto: [sinisterly] Oh, there is another way we can fix that. After all they departed from Akashi.
Botan: [even more sinisterly] Yes, remember the Tyrant, Evil Iwamoto. You know this young wizard can do to you what he did to him!
Mr. Iwamoto: True, and in possession of the Demon Slippers, he can do so ten times worse now. You win this round cockroach, but watch your back. I’ll get you, and you’re little blue penguin too!
[Mr. Iwamoto grabs Puu off of the bed and throws it out the door.]
Puu: PUUUUUU!!!
[After Puu clears, Mr. Iwamoto is gone.]
Botan: Oh dear, new to Yu and already made some bitter enemies.
Yusuke: Yeah, thanks to you!
Botan: Well, the only thing to do now is visit the Wizard!
Yusuke: [exhausted] Nothing phases you does it?
Botan: All you have to do is follow Snake Way to Spirit City and ask to speak with the Wizard of Yu.
Yusuke: Can I get a change of clothes?
Botan: What do you need that for?
Yusuke: Because right now I look like a girl!
Botan: Well, I have an extra kimono…or there are ogre loincloths around here if you think you can fit into one.
Yusuke: How’s that gonna help my image?!
Botan: There will be more clothes in Spirit City. [remembering] Oh! And [kisses Yusuke’s forehead] tell them I sent you.
Yusuke: [rubbing forehead] Ew! What was that for?
Botan: The Wizard usually does not see visitors, but my kiss will let them know you’re official and all that. [floats away] Tata!
Yusuke: Wait! [growls] Oh great. Well, I guess we better get started, Puu.
