Thank you. I was debating on whether or not to use so many exclamation points, but in the end i just did. Now that i think about it, it looks much better with just one.
Please read it when you can. Did it really get a editor's pick? OMyGEE! It did. I just checked. I still think i need to work on making things more clear though. It seems a little too...put together and fuzzy.
Very good! I enjoyed how the story played out, and like Anomaly, I enjoyed all the descriptions.
If you don't mind me nitpicking a bit, at one point on the first page, you used three exclamation points at once. You'll never need that many - one is always enough. But that was the only thing I found, since your technical skills are pretty sound. Good luck in the contest!
awesoem sauceness
I congragulate you on writing such a good story
if you feel like it you could stop by my portfolio and check out my halloween poem for the contest
I think this is very cool, and sort fo scary
keep up the great work
NightBeck
Otaku Eternal | Posted 11/02/08 | Reply
@asialonewolfe:
Well, if you think so, then my work here is done. :D It was fun reading your story for the contest, and all of us judges said great things about it~
asialonewolfe
Otaku Legend | Posted 11/02/08 | Reply
@NightBeck:
Thank you. I was debating on whether or not to use so many exclamation points, but in the end i just did. Now that i think about it, it looks much better with just one.
asialonewolfe
Otaku Legend | Posted 11/02/08 | Reply
@Angel Zakuro:
Please read it when you can. Did it really get a editor's pick? OMyGEE! It did. I just checked. I still think i need to work on making things more clear though. It seems a little too...put together and fuzzy.
Angel Zakuro
bird nerd. (Otaku Angel) | Posted 11/01/08 | Reply
I'll have to read this when I can!! ^_^ I noticed that it was an editor's pick for the contest! :3 Good job! *hugs*
NightBeck
Otaku Eternal | Posted 10/30/08 | Reply
Very good! I enjoyed how the story played out, and like Anomaly, I enjoyed all the descriptions.
If you don't mind me nitpicking a bit, at one point on the first page, you used three exclamation points at once. You'll never need that many - one is always enough. But that was the only thing I found, since your technical skills are pretty sound. Good luck in the contest!
Anomaly
Internet Champion (Otaku Eternal) | Posted 10/30/08 | Reply
I enjoyed your descriptions.
zero guardian
Otaku Eternal | Posted 10/30/08 | Reply
awesoem sauceness
I congragulate you on writing such a good story
if you feel like it you could stop by my portfolio and check out my halloween poem for the contest
I think this is very cool, and sort fo scary
keep up the great work
Zero15385bic
Lazy Chocobikies (Otaku Eternal) | Posted 10/29/08 | Reply
hey - first halloween story i've heard ^_^