FORCED P6
Setting: SNK Universe
Pairing: Mikasa x Annie
Rating: Language, PG-13
A/N: I have no comment. I am like devastated. Oh my poor babies, I don’t know why I make them suffer so much. ‘FORCED’ is like the most devastating fan-fiction I ever written. It’s incredibly challenging because I invest so much in those emotions. I really put myself in their places. The title is so fitting at this point because I’m literally forcing myself to just type it. But I’m also so fascinated by it. Like ‘wow, is this really happening?’ I know it makes no sense considering that I’m the writer, and I can make up anything I want, but to me it needs to make sense. I need to have justification for why that is, not because I feel like it. To me, this is how the characters would realistically react if they were faced under those situations base on their current personalities. Not exactly making them up just to fit whatever I want. Anyways, that’s just my intake. Thanks to those that still read my drivel nonsense, and all the notes any of my stories may get. You guys make me want to keep continuing them.
___________________________________________
It’s your turn to feel it. I promise you won’t like it.
On cue, Mikasa’s resolve was finding its way to her eyes as she started to shed tears out. Her vision was now blurry. She couldn’t see Annie very well, but she felt that Annie hated her. No. That was an understatement. She believes it. Annie’s angry expression soften at this not expecting it. It very much pained her to see her like this but she wasn’t going to falter at her display of emotion. She couldn’t afford to. My world is my enemy, what makes you so different? Determine to not budge with her fists still shaking from before, she was trying her best to gain control of herself once more. Her eyes quickly averted their entire attention to Mikasa who was starting to hold on to her scarf. Her livelihood.
Something went off on her head that she couldn’t make sense of it as much as she tries. Her entire body enrage with sudden anger she charges forward pushing Mikasa hard on the floor topping her as she shouts “He’s not here to safe you! Stand on your own two feet you coward!” Her eyes watered, entire vision impair she was crying her heart out as she let them hit Mikasa’s face like silver bullets who was now also in tears. Annie couldn’t pinpoint the reasons why, but it never cross her mind that Mikasa was sorry about everything. She couldn’t see it in her eyes even if she wanted to. All she needed to know was that she was there, taking everything Annie gave her.
All of these, is painful. Painful, agonizing familiarity.
Annie grabs Mikasa’s shirt, digging her fingers in and she’ll be damn if that’s the last things she’ll say to her. Damn be her blurry vision, damn be her tears overflowing, damn if she was sorry, damn if Mikasa’s in tears. “You expect me to give myself fully to you but you won’t to me? How dare you?!” She cries out looking at her with the most painful expression Mikasa has ever seen. Each and every word were piercing through her skin, forcing themselves into her unwillingly. She knew Annie was right about every single one of them. She was guilty on all charges. Mikasa was cover in guilt, and for a moment felt that she wasn’t even good enough to have Annie crying over her. She simply wanted to die.
Annie hits the pavement with her ball fists and cries out “You had no right to force yourself that way to me!” Pain is quickly shoot up through her hands, and feels it intensify on her wrists forcing her to close her eyes sharply feeling pain take over her. FUCK. She wasn’t thinking at all. With her heart expose on her sleeve, about to burst from her chest, consume with anger, pain and disappointment, she straightens herself up sitting on top of her and runs her hand across her eyes having her sleeves clean any of her tears regaining her vision back.
Annie’s panting softly, her heart still racing trying to let air back into her lungs and pulls her head back adverting her eyes to the ceiling in utter silence trying to gather herself from the headache she was now getting. Her head was spinning. It was pulsating. Nothing seem to be in focus. Her eyes swift to the side and notices that the entire room has becomes more visible. The air is damper. She can breathe some of the dust in her nostrils, she can even taste the wet puddle on the floor that was nearby. Everything look brighter. She can see clearly everything around her. Feeling bias about the choice of location, not forming any real opinion about why Mikasa had picked this room, besides the fact that it was empty, she closes her eyes for a moment allowing herself to calm her sudden heart rate inhaling deeply. Her body started to tune in at the silent echoes of her shouts from earlier. They were very loud to her. Her ears where pulsating that her words were now lingering within her. The fact that it was a dark room with no light coming in eluded her. It just looks brighter to her.
That’s how you know you been here long enough. Everything eventually makes sense then. Eventually. Everything does. Will this too?
Silence. That was all she needed right now. Time to think. Annie’s mind venture to a place it never had before. Not since then, and a part of her desperately wanted to be happy. To be at ease. To not be bother with anything at all. To be free. Annie had allow herself to go numb, she could sense the pulsating fingers that were still in pain from that hit she made, only she could no longer feel it. She started to feel something lift off her chest, something she didn’t had earlier. It was no longer tight. It wasn’t aching as bad. Relief. Perhaps. No. Resolved. Annie begins to really wonder what her life has become. Where it was going. What led her here in the first place? What could make her happy?
Mikasa. Her eyes jolted open and she was back staring at the ceiling; she had honestly forgotten about her for a moment. And for a moment, she was grateful that Mikasa allowed her to be the way she needed to. She was grateful that she didn’t speak. For once. Grateful that nothing broke the silence in that cold dusty room. Annie couldn’t had dealt with any interruptions, she honestly wouldn’t know what she would had said or done if Mikasa had utter nothing more than a word. She honestly couldn’t.
Mikasa was a fright. Nervous. And full of confusion laying perfectly still. Her heart hadn’t stop racing. She couldn’t speak even if she wanted to. Not after that display Annie gave her. She had no right. Mikasa’s tears had faded but the pain was agonizingly present. Annie saw it all over her face.
Silence. Once more.
Mikasa’s heart skips a beat as Annie unexpectedly leans down to kiss her in a swift movement. There was no pause. No hesitation behind her actions. Mikasa was beyond confuse. It actually frighten her. Annie repeats this twice before deciding to slide her tongue in as if testing the waters before going in fully. She merges herself completely into her for a moment, as if the prior events never happened. Mikasa was conflicted. But she wasn’t going to stop her from doing what she wanted. Mikasa could only responded back to it as cautiously as possible.
Annie shifts her head to the left still with her lips sealed against the brunettes, getting a better position for it, she muffles a soft whimper of pleasure. She finally comes to a stop deciding that she got her fill, she retrieves once more hovering her lips above Mikasa’s and whispers “Don’t ever speak again.” Mikasa widens her eyes as she hears this watching Annie pull back finally getting off her with a straight expression. There was no remorse in her eyes, she could see that she finally made up her mind as she made her way to the door. She had little to no idea that Annie was still very much in a daze. That her head was pulsating as she said those words. Most importantly, that she was still numb.
It didn’t matter; inside, Mikasa was broken.
As Annie lets the door close behind her, she has little to no idea, that she’s walking out with Mikasa’s voice.
