Younger Cousin, Nephew/Niece, or other Children: Video Game Candy
Because we all know, kids these days just don’t get all the sugar they need.

So you have this younger acquaintance of some sort. Perhaps they are related to you. Perhaps you affectionately call them “little n00b”. Perhaps they are merely the kid you have been stalking on Animal Crossing, and now wish to convince to meet you at the local park and get into your van.

Whatever the case, the best way to tame/entice these little people is to offer them candy. But not just any candy. Video game candy of course! Offer them some gummy versions of Yoshie, and they’ll be that annoying hyperactive monkey you’ve always wanted.

As a bonus, it works rather well on childish-acting older people as well. I can’t even tell you how many times that creepy old man at the park has convinced me to get into his van when he offered me a Link PEZ dispenser. This is mainly due to the emotional scarring.

But man oh man, those were some good candies.