ya thats a pretty big detail. I'd say he is into you and probably doesnt want to have the strain of a romance while on his mission. just give it time and dont worry too much. I'm sure it will work out for you in the end ^^
Okay, that makes sense. It could be that because we started getting so close, he panicked and decided to back off. His reason could be a mixture of being too shy and (I forgot to memtion this detail) he's going on an LDS mission in about six momths, which means for two years he would only be able to communicate with his friends through email once a week,and he doesn't want to start anything romantic and then have it strained by a limited amount of communication.
Hmmm thats tricky. If a guy isn't really familiar with dating or how to act when someone tells him they like him they seem to pull away. I have a guy that i dated once in middle school and when in high school i tried so many times to re approach him and date him. It's the same as with you. They seem interested and have a lot in common but shy away. I eventually gave us we are great friends still (going on 8 years) but thats me. As for you just try to be his friend and don't really push the matter. If you feel like you just want to break through the zone go on another date and try discussing the issue. If he seems a bit distant he may just not be ready or know how to have a relationship. If that is the case then just take it one day at a time
Yeah, trying to balance the two is what I've been trying to do lately. It just frustrates me when I wonder if it's worth it, one way or another.
And as for more details, I guess some more details I could give you:
1. Ninja and I have known each other for 5 1/2 years, and have been friends for 2 1/2 years. We are nowhere near strangers.
2. I started liking him a little over a year ago, and I told him that I liked him last April. He acted like it didn't phase him a bit.
3. For the most part of the past year, also, it seemed as if he liked me back to some extent. However, he never really gave any clear answer one way or another.
4. We have a ridiculous amount in common. There are a few differences, but for the most part we see eye to eye on everything from where do we want to live when we're older to what's our favorite ice cream to religion.
5. After the date, he still seemed to be friendly to an extent, however, lately it seems all he really cares about is reading manga on his Kindle, choosing to do that the majority of the time rather than associate with friends. However, he isn't ignoring us - if we talk to him, he'll pay attention.
6. He's never been much of a ladies man, I'm really the only girl he's even been much of good friends with, as far as I know (he might have some random girlfriend back in Japan -- and yes, he's been to Japan. He spent his early childhood there (his mom's Japanese) and has been back there multiple times since).
Huh, I hadn't thought about him thinking that the date as a whole wasn't that good. It seemed like it had went rather well.
And don't worry, I'm not pushing my friends away too much. I still talk to them on a daily basis.
And about having him hang with my friend group, well, actually he used to be part of the friend group. However, when it got too large (now it's more like three friend groups awkwardly squished into one) he and his best friend decided to break off, and I decided to follow them. We still stay close enough to talk to the others, and we still talk some of our closest friends from that group on a regular basis. However, while he doesn't mind associating with the group as a whole occasionally, it seems as if he doesn't plan on rejoining the group officially any time soon.
These situations are always tricky! I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling this way. Your best bet is to give both parties enough attention ^^ It may seem pointless now but trying to handle another person and friends can be hard :/ I wish I knew a little more about the situation so I'd have better advice. Keep your head up and smile (:
KyraChan
Grand Otaku | Posted 01/14/15 | Reply
@nikkeh09:
Yeah, you were. ^^
nikkeh09
~Nikkeh~ (Grand Otaku) | Posted 01/14/15 | Reply
@KyraChan:
of course I hope I was actually a help (:
KyraChan
Grand Otaku | Posted 01/14/15 | Reply
@nikkeh09:
Yup ^^ Thanks for helping me figure things out ^^'
nikkeh09
~Nikkeh~ (Grand Otaku) | Posted 01/14/15 | Reply
@KyraChan:
ya thats a pretty big detail. I'd say he is into you and probably doesnt want to have the strain of a romance while on his mission. just give it time and dont worry too much. I'm sure it will work out for you in the end ^^
KyraChan
Grand Otaku | Posted 01/14/15 | Reply
@nikkeh09:
Okay, that makes sense. It could be that because we started getting so close, he panicked and decided to back off. His reason could be a mixture of being too shy and (I forgot to memtion this detail) he's going on an LDS mission in about six momths, which means for two years he would only be able to communicate with his friends through email once a week,and he doesn't want to start anything romantic and then have it strained by a limited amount of communication.
So I'll wait and see how it goes.
nikkeh09
~Nikkeh~ (Grand Otaku) | Posted 01/14/15 | Reply
@KyraChan:
Hmmm thats tricky. If a guy isn't really familiar with dating or how to act when someone tells him they like him they seem to pull away. I have a guy that i dated once in middle school and when in high school i tried so many times to re approach him and date him. It's the same as with you. They seem interested and have a lot in common but shy away. I eventually gave us we are great friends still (going on 8 years) but thats me. As for you just try to be his friend and don't really push the matter. If you feel like you just want to break through the zone go on another date and try discussing the issue. If he seems a bit distant he may just not be ready or know how to have a relationship. If that is the case then just take it one day at a time
KyraChan
Grand Otaku | Posted 01/13/15 | Reply
@nikkeh09:
Yeah, trying to balance the two is what I've been trying to do lately. It just frustrates me when I wonder if it's worth it, one way or another.
And as for more details, I guess some more details I could give you:
1. Ninja and I have known each other for 5 1/2 years, and have been friends for 2 1/2 years. We are nowhere near strangers.
2. I started liking him a little over a year ago, and I told him that I liked him last April. He acted like it didn't phase him a bit.
3. For the most part of the past year, also, it seemed as if he liked me back to some extent. However, he never really gave any clear answer one way or another.
4. We have a ridiculous amount in common. There are a few differences, but for the most part we see eye to eye on everything from where do we want to live when we're older to what's our favorite ice cream to religion.
5. After the date, he still seemed to be friendly to an extent, however, lately it seems all he really cares about is reading manga on his Kindle, choosing to do that the majority of the time rather than associate with friends. However, he isn't ignoring us - if we talk to him, he'll pay attention.
6. He's never been much of a ladies man, I'm really the only girl he's even been much of good friends with, as far as I know (he might have some random girlfriend back in Japan -- and yes, he's been to Japan. He spent his early childhood there (his mom's Japanese) and has been back there multiple times since).
KyraChan
Grand Otaku | Posted 01/13/15 | Reply
@:
Huh, I hadn't thought about him thinking that the date as a whole wasn't that good. It seemed like it had went rather well.
And don't worry, I'm not pushing my friends away too much. I still talk to them on a daily basis.
And about having him hang with my friend group, well, actually he used to be part of the friend group. However, when it got too large (now it's more like three friend groups awkwardly squished into one) he and his best friend decided to break off, and I decided to follow them. We still stay close enough to talk to the others, and we still talk some of our closest friends from that group on a regular basis. However, while he doesn't mind associating with the group as a whole occasionally, it seems as if he doesn't plan on rejoining the group officially any time soon.
nikkeh09
~Nikkeh~ (Grand Otaku) | Posted 01/13/15 | Reply
These situations are always tricky! I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling this way. Your best bet is to give both parties enough attention ^^ It may seem pointless now but trying to handle another person and friends can be hard :/ I wish I knew a little more about the situation so I'd have better advice. Keep your head up and smile (: