Sorry, guys, I had meant to do this New Year's post next, but you get this awkward, emotional rant typed from a phone at a basketball game first.

So, most of you guys know about Ninja, I've talked about him plenty before. However, lately it seems like some things have changed, and I don't know why. In the middle of December, we went on a date, which went along really well. However, since then he seems more or less a lot colder... Not that he's been rude to me. He still treats me like a human. It's just that things don't feel anywhere near as open or friendly anymore. Thing is, there'll still be moments that feel like the old days... They're just few and far between. And it bugs me because I'm not sure if it's a lost cause, and I should abandon all hope of anything truly happening, or if I should try and stick this hard time through.

What makes it worse is that I feel like I've estranged myself from my most of my friends in my attempt to get close to him. They haven't stopped being great friends, it's more on my end - I now find most of them rather boring, and I feel like I'd be even less happier if I ditched Ninja in order to reconcile with them, rather than deal with whatever junk's come between he and I.

And on top of this all, I have a cold. Yay me.