"THEN PULL HARDER!" Naruto cried, trying himself. He was in hysterics now so he didn't pay any mind to Sasuke's hands on his...erm...backside.
"That isn't going to help." Sasuke growled. "Stop yelling or someone will come in here."
"Then what am I supposed to do?! BE EMO!? DYE MY HAIR!? TELL SAKURA-CHAN, 'Sorry to cancel our date, but I want to go cut myself instead'?! HUH?!"
"Not a bad idea..." The brunette muttered, only to receive a kick to the face (which he neatly dodged).
"YOU'RE NOT HELPING!"
Sasuke paused, reaching into his pockets. "Hold still." And he pulled out a switchblade.
O_O "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" Naruto started crawling (pretty fast, actually) out of the bathroom. "YOU AREN'T TOUCHING MY ASS WITH THAT!"
"HEY!" Sasuke ran after him, "Do you want them off or not!?"
"I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE!" D< "I'M AFRAID YOU'LL CUT A CHUNK OUT OF MY ASS!"
-___- "Why the HELL would I WANT a piece of your ass?!"
"I don't know, to mount it on your wall?!"
o_e "JUST HOLD STILL."
"NO!"
Kicking and screaming, they tumbled out of the restroom, out of the theater, and onto the sidewalk. "Stop flailing, dobe!"
"YOU'D BETTER HAVE A STEADY HAND!" Naruto hollered, only to suddenly fall abruptly silent. "...why are we even struggling with this? It's hopeless anyway."
Sasuke stared at Naruto in disbelief. This coming from the guy who was surrender retarded? "....excuse me?"
"I mean..." Naruto slumped into a heap. "...it's not like I care anymore.
Sasuke met this strange speech with silence. "...Naruto...how do you feel?"
"I don't know." The blonde said, his expression dull and expressionless. "I don't feel anything."
Horror passed over Sasuke's expression. It really was happening. "Naruto..." He said, "Hold still." The switchblade edged closer to Naruto. "Please let this work..." With swift precision, Sasuke slashed a long piece of the pants, yanking them off. "I...I've got them!" He sounded triumphant.
"HUH?" Naruto blinked, on his hands and knees. "You did?"
"Sasuke?!"
Both boys froze where they were. "...Sakura?"
Sakura- and Tenten, actually- stood outside of the movie theater, looking at the boys. "What....what are you two doing!?" For some reason her face was flushed a deep crimson, though it wasn't of anger it was more of...embarrassment?
"...." For a long time, neither boy spoke. It dawned on both of them suddenly that Naruto was on his hands and knees with only his underwear on, and Sasuke was kneeling so that he was brushing up against Naruto's behind and he was holding a pair of ripped leather pants.
In short, they were doggy-style.
"S-Sakura-chan this isn't-"
"I don't want to hear it Naruto." Sakura was covering her nose. "If you didn't really want to date me, you shouldn't have asked me." And she ran into a bathroom.
Tenten stared at both of them. "Lemme guess, the pants almost sucked the life out of Naruto, got stuck, then Sasuke had to use a switchblade, which made Naruto run away and both of you ended up out here for Sakura to see this?"
Both boys nodded in shock. Remarkable.
"Well..." Tenten shrugged, "Good luck explaining." And she walked off.
After a moment of silence (and a look at the crowd that had formed around them), Naruto and Sasuke sprinted after them both. "WAIT! IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!"
The End. <3
