- Created By Oni Chu
The Emotional Rollercoaster.
It's been a while hasn't it?
Well, my dads done it again, he's taken away the internet from me, so I'm sorry for not visiting and commenting you guys.
I'm not sure as to say if this is bad news or good news? Or maybe even a little bit of both.
On Friday, for the first time in almost a month, I ran into Nick.
We were in L2 in China Town and in walks Nick, I spot him, he spots me and walks out the door. My friends Quan and Mitsuki run after him, trying to pull him back inside. They tell him to talk to me. They pull me up from my seat..awkwardness. The pure essence of love and abuse fulls my mind. A certain stiffness between us both, then it brakes in a long awaited embrace.
His hug, was long, filled with guilt terror and warmth. All he could say was "I'm sorry" or "Are you Okay?". We talked outside, it wasnt easy, Quan had to ask both of us questions to answer so that we would talk. Nick broke up with Myraii, he says it's because she was controlling his life. Then He also said because he cheated on her too, he can't look me in the eye when he says that..
He's getting a load of peircings, Monroe, and nipple peircings.. (ew.) & he's working at a hobby shop. So I guess he's ok. It's awkward silence again, so we hug again. He asks if we can talk inside so we go.
I go to the washroom, I'm confused.
So many missing peices. I come out, he asks Quan if he wants to come with him to an anime screening. Quan refuses. He says bye, and hugs me for a long time for the last time. He plays with my hair a bit, asks me if I'm okay. Then he just holds me, looks at me and I look away, because everything felt so right, but so wrong, I wanted to kiss him. Whenever he held me like that we did. But it's not the same anymore, I can't do that. I can't hold his hand, and he won't whisper "I love you."
After that, we hug again and he tells me to take care.
Then he's gone..
I'm sad.
Will I ever see him again? I hope so. I love him still..even after all he's done, and I don't know how he feels about any of this still and it upsets me.
I don't cry anymore, I'm always on the verge of it though.
What is going to happen..I dont' know, but if I could I would take him back. My heart is ready. My head is still fighting.
End
