My whole body was tense...the elixir I had drank slowly wore off the more copies I formed. I knew there wasn't much longer I could hold on without a break. I needed to stop...but Xirian kept saying how close he was...so very close. Verex kept eyeing me...examining my facial expressions...every time I caught him...it was all I could do to keep a neutral face. To show NO SIGN of fatigue. But it was getting worse...My vision was starting to blur...
"RaXi! You're losing concentration! The copy is starting to condense!" I heard Xirian command.
I jolted and the copy turned to snow before their eyes...I had killed her. "I'm sorry...I'll make another." I apologized, but it was no use. Verex started to make his approach...another lecture was coming. And then I felt a hand on my shoulder.
"It never fails with you...learn your limits RaXi...or have you forgotten I have copies too...I said I would help." The voice spoke. It was Tanex. A feeling I would only deny in the future rushed through me. Relief. All of my muscles seemed to relax in response to it, and I slowly began to slump over. Verex caught me. Raising me, it felt like I was in a daze as he cradled me in his arms. "There are several rooms. Go ahead and take her to get some rest...see that she does...RaXi is a stubborn one. I just got Nyx and the girls to proper quarters as well."
"I understand." Verex responded. "Thank you Tanex. Xirian, I'll be off now...can you handle things-"
"I never needed your help to start with!" Xirian denied obstinately.
I could hear Verex laugh slightly...then everything went black.
***
As I carried RaXi through the hall, I chose a random room and entered quietly. How long had it been since she looked so peaceful? I couldn't even remember...to my dismay. I had wanted to be the one to make her smile...to free her from the constraints of her fate. And yet look at what had happened....I myself had become bound. RaXi knew it...and it no doubt burdened her everyday. How she always loathed chains and servitude.
I lay her on the bed gently and sit on the side of her sleeping form. I couldn't help but admire her in this state...it really was a rare occurrence. To catch her sleeping...she was always so protective of herself...never trusting anyone. Yet, I had been fortunate enough to see this side of her a couple times...during my time as Vincent. I carried all those memories fondly...each excursion...each day with RaXi.
Her face was light...it seemed to glisten in the candle lit room...her skin not seeming normal at all. But as though she were some ethereal being. I felt my hand instinctively reach for her. Up to her forehead as I gently brushed her bangs to the side, away from her eyes, then down slowly caressing her cheek, until finally my fingers found her delicate lips. I found myself leaning in...ever so slowly...just once...one small kiss...that's all...
Her eyes snapped open. Halting instantly...I immediately felt nothing but shame for what I was about to do! I began to pull away, when she grabbed me by the scruff of my collar and yanked me to her...pulling me into a deep and passionate kiss...the likes of which I was sure I'd NEVER experience again.
***
I don't know why I did it...but when I opened my eyes and they'd met Verex's...I couldn't help myself. I suppose I could blame it mainly on the fact that I was in a bit of a daze...but I wouldn't...I wouldn't regret this. He couldn't be destroyed by me...I couldn't kill him...and maybe...just maybe I could save him...
Slowly I released him and we pulled apart...our eyes trapped in a ceaseless gaze. He opened his mouth to say something when suddenly...he seemed wracked with pain. Grabbing his throat he keeled over to the ground and writhed back and forth violently. I didn't know what was happening...I didn't know what to do...I was paralyzed.
The episode seemed to go on for several minutes...and then...it stopped completely. Verex lay sprawled on the floor...completely motionless. His eyes were still wide...he looked the part of a dead man. I had killed him...This was the single thought that protruded in my mind.
***
I couldn't explain it...I floated in a dark abyss. There was nothing...absolutely nothing. Until very suddenly a screen before me seemed to light up...it played something familiar. A memory. The night I had been made to form a pact.
I watched as the recently formed nobody me agreed to the terms of the contract set forth by Xerebus without hesitation...all to find her. RaXi...ever since I'd met her...she was the only thing I lived for. After Father died...I'd had nothing...no one. Cloud and his group of friends had tried to accept me, tried to make me feel better about life...but I had never gotten too close to anyone again. And then I'd found her. She was just as alone as I was. And sitting there in the rain like that...just as broken as me too...I'd never let it show...but it had been there...the overwhelming loss and void my father had left me with. The need to prove myself...not to the world... but to him.
I recalled the searing sensation as the memory me screamed out in agony. The very first time Xerebus would invoke that pain on me. But not the last. Oh no...I would receive that very same sensation every day without respite. For that is how he intended to get me to talk...about what...heh...not even I knew what he wanted from me. I didn't have it. Even if I did...I doubt my spirit would allow him to have it. That man that I came to despise with all of my being. Not for hurting me and causing me the greatest of pain...no...for lying to me and keeping me from what I desired most. THAT is why I hated him.
And then the scene seemed to crack from all edges...I watched as I had risen up the first time...could SEE the shackles as they faded into non-existence...hidden from all eyes but my own. The Memory Me seemed to stare straight at me and smile...and then the entire image shattered to billions of pieces...
I breathed in with all my might it seemed as I returned to the light. Even though it wasn't really light...I blinked and felt myself sit up quickly...heaving as I forced myself to stand. RaXi sat there a look of confusion, fear and shock on her face. I examined my wrists...instinctively reached for my neck...I felt...light. As though a weight had been lifted....
"Verex...what....what..." RaXi stammered.
"RaXi...." I began, then looked straight at her. "I...I think you freed me...."
We sat in silence...pondering if this was really true...or if it was just wishful thinking...
~RaXi/Verex
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hehe...so what'd you think of that one! ^^ Is Verex REALLY free? Does RaXi realize what she really DID?! Bum bum bum...yeah...okay it's really late and I'm in a weird mood. I really hope the post was good though. lol. ~.~''
