And now boys and girls, Otaku of all ages, here's your host, SHUKAKU THE SAND SPIRIT!!!
Me:Good evening ladies and Gents!
Crowd:-clap, clap, clap-
Me:*staring at the audience bugged eyed* Would you mind applauding a little longer? I only have 1 hour worth of material. Anyway, I was going to ask a friend to talk about her hatred of her cousin, but I found out that she has to go somewhere special, so I'm dedicating this show to DeidaraNarutoClan, also known as Cate.
Crowd:-claps loudly-
Me:First off, The Amazing Naruto will now attempt to read his own mind!
Naruto:-comes into the stage, waves, then starts to read his mind-
Me:*turning to the audience*It's great to see all you cool cats out there!
Kyuubi:-fox bark-
Me:Sercurity!
Deidara(wearing an officer uniform):You rang, un?
Me:Arrest the teme.
Deidara:You're coming to the Akatsuki, un!-handcuffs Kyuubi-
Kyuubi:I'm gonna kill ya, dobe!-disappears with Deidara-
Naruto:-fails, shrugs and shakes his head-
Me:Sorry folks. You can get your money back at the door. Let's look at some of the funny moments I've endured.
Screen:-turns on-
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Gaara*reading a book*:Wow! Van Gogh cut off his ear for the woman he loved. I wonder what I could cut off?
Me:How about that last shred of dignity?
~
Kankuro:Shukaku, how would you like a nice treat?
Me:Lay it on me!
Kankuro:-takes out accordian-It's sort of a rap polka thing.
Me:-slaps forehead-Suckered again!
~
TV:And now, everyone's favorite Polka band..."The Geek Boys"! Accordians Rule!!!
Kankuro:-waves foam finger-YESSS!
Me:-rolls eyes-It's the end of the world...
~
Me*to the audience*:Will baka come up with something to do this weekend?
Kankuro:-thinking-
Me:The crowd is on the edge of their seats...
Kankuro:Polka!
Me:-points to the left-Single file...exit to the left.
~
Kankuro:Ever hear one those voices inside you, Gaara?
Gaara:Unfortunatly, yes.
Kankuro:A voice telling you to do something wild and crazy?
Me:Does killing people into a bloody pulp count?
~
Me:-points to Naruto-Staring contest!
Naruto:-looks up in the sky-
Me:At each other, you idiot!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kankuro:-runs up on stage-Hey! I do NOT like polka!
Me:Then why did I see those accordian pictures in your room. Forget the baka! Here is a funny, but cruel scene of me and Kyuubi.
Crowd:-cheers-
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Me:-chasing teme-Catch the fox! Catch the fox!
Kyuubi:Say, Isn't that a tail?
Me:-chases tail-Chase the tail! Chase the tail!
Kyuubi:Raccoon-dogs...You gotta love 'em.
_____________________________________________________________________
Me:Okay folks, today's theme of our show is true identities. Our two guests are the Leader and Tobi. Here is how my show works:Each episode will have a thrid guest called a mystery OC. At the end of the show, I will give you only parts of the OC profile. The first person who complete's the profile in their comments will keep that OC and be the next guest on the next show.
Tobi:Why is Tobi here?
Leader:Cuz' the fans want to know what we really are.
Me:Why hello Mystery.
???:Yo Shukaku! It's good to be here.
Me:Ok my homie, show us what ya got!
???:Well, It's decided that the leader is a guy named Pein. But before then, most people believed that Pein is really the 4th hokage!
Leader:-gasps-Lies, all lies! How can that be? The 4th hokage died just to save his village. Even if I was the hokage, why would I take out my own son's demon after I put it in him?
???:You got a point there. As for you Tobi, some people believed that you were Obito, a student of the 4th hokage because that explains why you annoy Deidara. Other's believe you're Madara Uchiha, the real mastermind of the Akatsuki!
Crowd:-faints-
Tobi:Tobi is a good boy!
Leader:You call THAT evil?
???:I rest my case...
Me:Well folks, I think that's all for today. So to close the episode, here is Mystery's profile. Fill in the ??? in your comments.
Name:???
Age:15
Gender:???
Rank:Chunin
Village:Star
Hair:Black
Eyes:Green
Skin tone:???
Likes:Arguing, always being right, friends, blood
Dislikes:Akatsuki, being wrong, french, ???
Loves:???
Favorite food:Pizza
Favorite Music:???
Favorite Movie:???
Favorite Book:???
Justus:???
Demons:None
Kenkei Genkai:???
Weapon:???
Sensai:???
Teamates:???, ???
Family:Father(deceased),???, ???, ???
History:???
Quote:"Hey ya slowpokes, I'm waiting!"
Tune in next time!
“Set dresser to stage!” a crew member named Naara shouted, holding a clipboard and wearing a set of headphones.
“Check lights!” another crew member named Might Guy exclaimed.
“Hey, where’s those guys and my narrators?” the director, Tsunade groaned.
A crew was setting a television set for a story-telling show as two people were sitting in some seats, reading a comic book. One was 18 years old with a long tail, black and yellow eyes, and heart tattoos all over her body. Her name is Misa. The other had a purple T-shirt, red vest, black jeans, red hair, and emerald eyes who would be in the story "The fiddler on the Sand and Leaf". Her name is Ai.
The two hummed happily as they read their comic book. “Singing, singing,” Misa began to sing quietly.
“We will be singing all day long,” Ai joined in. “When we’re singing, there is nothing wrong!”
The two began to get into the beat, and jumped on their chairs as they danced, arm hanging over each others’ shoulders and doing the can-can. “Ninjateers, HEY!!”
Suddenly they realized they were making a bit of a racket. Gulping, they sank back into their chairs…“La, la, la, la, la, la!” Misa finished quietly.
“Talent to the set, please!” another crew member named Choji Akimichi shouted.
“We’re live in sixty seconds!” another crew member named Asura said.
Misa and Ai gasped, hearing the crew. “Sixty seconds!” Misa repeated.
“Let’s get going!” Ai said. The two quickly ran to the story-tellers’ dressing room.
“Mr. Yakushi! Mr. Momochi!” Misa called, rapping her fist on the room’s door.
“Fellows, it’s time!” Ai added. Suddenly the door swung wide open, slamming the two comic-readers into the wall behind it. The narrators, Kabuto Yakushi and Zabuza Momochi stepped out of their dressing room casually with storybooks, totally ignoring the moans coming from Misa and Ai.
“Um…sirs, pardon us,” Ai said to Kabuto and Zabuza nervously as she and Misa followed the story-tellers.
Kabuto turns around. “What? What do you want?” he demanded impatiently.
“Today is the day, right?” Misa asked. “You guys promised we can sing our songs, right?”
Then misa and Ai both pulled out their guitars. The two started to play their instruments. “All for one…” Kabuto and Zabuza immediately snatched the two’s guitars and Kabuto and Zabuza then bonked Misa and Ai over their heads with their own guitars, and then left the poor gals heartbroken.
“Aw…but you promised…” Misa whined pitifully. But Kabuto and Zabuza don’t care and walked away from her and Ai.
“Guess we won’t make our big debuts,” Ai sighed.
Misa despairingly looked toward the narrators. “Ah…uh, sirs! Sirs! No, no, no! Kabuto! Zabuza!” She tried to warn them, but too late.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!” Both Kabuto and Zabuza yelled in despair as they fell through a trapdoor.
“…the stage is this way,” Misa finished feebly, pointing to another way.
“Let’s have some quiet people!” Asuma shouted from the set.
The books that the story-tellers were carrying had been tossed into the air and were heading for Misa and Ai. “Watch out!” Ai bellowed, pointing into the air. “Rogue storybooks!” The two tried to avoid them, but smacked them clean in the faces, sending them flying all over the place. Ricocheting to the stage, screaming.
“Five seconds to air!” Might Guy called when suddenly Misa and Ai crashed into two large, red armchairs where the narrators are supposed to sit on the set, a comfortable dark library-type room with an open fire.
“Cue music!” Naara exclaimed.
“And ACTION!” Tsunade shouted, when she suddenly realized that Misa and Ai were in the armchairs and not the readers. “What are those idiots doing there?!”
“Wha-…” Misa groaned as she and Ai groggily looked around. “Oh crud…We’re on the set!”
“Where’s the narrators?!” Asuma whispered.
“Shh! We’re live already, just roll with it! Hey, you two!” Tsunade shouted to the two. Misa and Ai just sat there, staring vacantly and absolutely terrified that they were before a live audience. “Don’t just sit there like idiots! Do something!” Tsunade cried. Misa and Ai continued doing squat, eyes wide as they gazed into the cameras helplessly. “You’re on camera! For crying out loud, say something!”
“Hello…” the two said quietly.
“Tell the story!” Naara silently shouted.
“Ah…ahem,” Ai said, clearing her throat anxiously. “Misa and I will tell you the story of…da…da…da…”
“The story of King Shukaku!” Misa suddenly shouted.
“That story was already invented!” Tsunade snapped.
“Then…we’ll tell the story of…” Ai suddenly spotted her and Misa’s comic book as an idea popped into her head, “The Three Demonteers!” she finished proudly, pulling out the comic. Its front cover displaying three heroes: a boy with red hair, a boy with spiky raven hair and a boy with blonde hair – all wearing fancy uniforms and hats.
“This is our personal favorite version,” Misa said, catching on with Ai's idea.
“The one with pictures!” Ai laughed, pointing at the cover. “And, of course, OUR songs. Ha, ha! Anyway…” She flipped over the comic book to show the pictures. “Our story begins…in the gutter…” In the pictures, it shows the three heroes, but at much younger ages. All lonely in a gutter with nothing to eat except a small can of peas.
“Where poor young street urchins: Subuku no Gaara, Sasuke Uchiha and Naruto Uzemaki struggle to survive.”
Suddenly bandits jumped out to attack the kids.
“But, oh no, bad guys!” Misa continued from where Ai left off. “Won’t anyone defend these innocent little children?”
The kids try to defend themselves. Naruto was trying to fight off one bandit by swinging his fists, but the bandit just held him away by arm’s length. Sasuke was scared out of his wits by one. And Gaara was held in the air by the scruff of his shirt.
“Anyone? Anyone?! Anyone?!” Misa cried melodramatically. “Well, anyone?” she asked dully.
Suddenly three figures jumped in…….Ninjateers! Shukaku Ichibi, Kyuubi Yoko and Demon Sasuke stood proudly before them. The kids gawked in awe as the bandits looked frightened.
“Ha! Ha! The royal Ninjateers! Yes!” Ai laughed. “I wasn’t worried for a second!”
The Ninjateers easily fought off the bandits with their abilities that they were trained for, chasing the bandits away. The kids came from hiding behind a corner, Gaara gazed in amazement. Shukaku turned around, spotting him and smiled to him.
“And after the dust settles…a kind ninjateer gave Subuku no Gaara a gift,” Misa said with a smirk.
Shukaku hands Gaara his ninjateer hat. Gaara was excited as he placed it over his head…but it drooped over to his eyes, far too big.
“Ha! Ha! Don’t worry, fella, you’ll grow into ‘em,” Ai assured Gaara.
After the fight when the demons went back into the kids' bodies, Gaara – with his ninjateer hat and with Sasuke and Naruto by his side – they took out toy wooden swords, and stood proudly and attempting to look courageous.
“And from that day on, Gaara, Sasuke and Naruto dreamed of being great 'Demonteers'…”
The three friends are now shown grown up, and in a basement as janitors for the royal castle.
“Ah, but as the years passed……their dream was still as far away as ever…”
To be continued...
