I figured that I should just make this a full fledged journal post since it’s explains more so of the sudden rush of the moment post that I did last night. Also of the way I was feeling at the moment as well. This was the reply of the comment of the last post. I starting and yet again I just let it loose. Not as energetic as last time since I just came from work but definitely just as passionate about how I feel.
Thanks for responding!
I'm glad you found it inspirational; I hope other people did as well. It was such a spur-of-the-moment kind of thing, I just wanted to write what I was feeling for the last few days in this journal since I felt creatively and emotionally blocked. In retrospect I feel kind of embarrassed of just going out there like that. But at the same time it was nothing of mature nature, bashing, or putting out a completely personal matter. I just wanted people to feel how I felt. Excited, caged, creativity, rage, the whole nine rolled up and pushed in your mouth. Mostly the need to create and share it with the world. I haven’t really posted anything in some time, and seeing everything one drawing, commenting, and posting I feel really bounded and caged. As much as I love to be active on the nets in general besides of my days off, I have no time for any of it. And when I’m off, I’m crazy tired and just want to sleep and be lazy.
It’s a real oxy moron moment of my life really. I have most of the things that I wanted since college, a good paying job, a boyfriend, great friends, a *less* depressing household to come in. And yet one of my life passions seemly was the cost of it. I barely have time to draw/or do things when I’m not a work ha-ha. Barely have time to be crafty. The most I can do is watch what I can on the internet and when I don’t have things to do on my days off, dedicate them to exploring my new venture and pray that I won’t be at where I am for too long. I love working and really earning cash but I need a creative one. Investment is not for me, there’s no room for creatively in that field. Its just sit on a computer, learn how to do it and then do for 10 hours a day 4 days a week.
My eyes curse my name everyday for that. XD
Maybe this happened so that I can really put my foot forward even more so since I’m in the position to do so. Everything has been working in my favor even when I thought I wasn’t on track or was lead astray. I do believe everything happens for a reason. But I definitely learned as much action you can put into anything you have to be as patient so that things can be placed properly in your life. If you go too fast you might be out of sync of what needs to be done to get where you need to go. If you don’t put your self out there and not act on perfect time when that event presents it self, the ball doesn’t start rolling either. It’s all about going with the flow I guess. ^-^0
Thanks for the reply really, I appreciate it and your words!
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With that I just wanted to state some other things that have happened in my life, quite some exciting ones!
• I made my first internet purchase! It was from Esty. I’ve gotten a fake food easer set for the molds and two Japanese decoden books. It was something too; I was in training (additional training) on the computer and then a total rush of energy and excitement totally slapped me on the face. Telling me I have to buy this! I couldn’t shake the feeling of wanting to buy it. Of course I been wanted to buy stuff from esty but was too scared to do so. But that day was different, I had to buy it. So that night as soon as I got home I signed up for esty and luckily the name “the candy sanctuary” wasn’t taken. I thought that in it self was kind of freaky, I thought some one would have been taken but once again that “magical” touch has creped its way into all this. So I got an account searched for what I wanted and brought it. It’s coming from Japan so it may take a week or so. I brought it on Monday so I hope it will be there by then. I’m going to have to take pictures of it when I’m done!
• I got some latex gloves and face mask for working with silicone for the whipped cream for my crafts. I’ve tried the modeling paste but it doesn’t keep its form that much. It sinks a lot and loses a lot of the detail of “whipped cream”. But I can still use it for plenty of things like melting chocolate, cream filling, and icing. I’m glad that I brought it and found so many good uses for it. I got to take pictures of that as well.
• The cute clay tutorial is to turning into my Candy Sanctuary blog! I figured that it would far more useful for my new adventure rather then a blog full of other people tutorials primarily. I’ll still post there (when I have time mind you) but it will be on my progress of my business adventure and crafts.
• I’m trying to start my gift art extravaganza! I have tons of people that I want to draw for but the first one has to be for mewpudding. Our art trade is WAY over due and it’s just damn rude to this point to not have posted my part of it. XD So yeah your first my lady. I want to post a list of people I’m planning to draw for but I want it to be secret too ;3
• I’m trying to fine tune my chibi style and my drawings in general. I think I’ve been lacking on the realistic side of things especially in the face. It’s too hard to try to make eyes that aren’t the whole generic big eye thing. I’ve been practicing bodies a lot at work and I’ve gotten better making them less weird and stuff. So yeah I think some of my gift art will contain some nicely made chibi’s and art.
• I’m getting TONS of déjà vu’s lately. Like at least once a week. I haven’t had this many since middle school. Real freaky if you ask me. :0
