Writing introductions is a bit tedious so....just take a look at my first post if you want to know more....

....and if you get curious about the name of this World or my posts, check out the second one.

Point of Purpose

I've learned something about myself since being in Japan; I am not a good leader. My mother always told me I was a leader & not a follower, & I suppose she's half right. But just not following doesn't mean you have any clue how to lead. Not that that's such a bad thing. There's more than 2 things to do in life.

I wasn't looking forward to today at all. Well, really I wasn't looking forward to this week at all. It's 5 days straight of jr. high with no elementary or testing days to ease the sick-fluttery-I-don't-belong-here feeling in my stomach. I think it might be the only one like that this month at least...

Today being Tuesday though, I was dreading it even more than the other days. I've hated Tuesday since I was a kid (bad dance school memories...) so I figured I might as well stay up late and read as much as I wanted last night. At least I'd have an excuse for being in a bad mood, right?

As I slowly grew into consciousness on the bus I remembered that one of my English teachers had gone to the doctor with a bad fever at lunch time on Monday. I tried not to let myself imagine the pleasure of teaching 1st period by myself. She's a tough lady, she wouldn't let a little fever keep her from returning the kids' tests. I told myself not to get excited, that I'd just be let down....

Then I got to school. Four teachers absent, including fever-lady.

Nothing could have woken me up better, or faster. Another English teacher came along and sat in the room 1st period (just in case) while the kids & I celebrated by playing games. She's got a cold too. She didn't need to hang around. Of course I shouldn't complain.......so on the way downstairs I offered to handle the rest of fever-lady's classes for the day. Unfortunately she only had 1 more, but add that & prep for it to my already scheduled 2 & suddenly my day was completely full.

I only thought of Bella & Edward twice. Once after lunch while waiting for the next class to start, & again after the last class was over. It was easy even then to put them out of my mind though, thankfully. I remember thinking at one point, "I think I'm having a really good day here...." & I knew it was because I had something to do, not just something to occupy my time. It's not often that I really feel useful in a jr. high school.

When I say I'm not a good leader, maybe it's better to say I'm not a good creator......meh.......that may not be the right word either (I need more words.......) I can't make something out of nothing very well. Or rather, I'm not particularly motivated to try. I'm much better at restructuring, patching & morphing things that already exist. Give me a bunch of stuff & I'll put it in the most effective order. Give me problem with certain conditions & I'll meet them for you. Give me a void & I can fill it. Especially if you give it to me on short notice.