Finally, I've made one! my first world ever! A world where I can post all of my feelings!
OK! here we go! Ehemm!
Since childhood, I never had a wealthy youth. There's a feeling of self pity in my heart when I see children outside with their toys. Then used to ask myself, "Why I can't have those toys?" As I grow up, I'm starting to understand the status of our life! I became aware that our family earns enough money for our primary needs.
but I'm also beginning to fight the self pity inside. I think this poverty helped me develop a kind of skill to replace my desire for material happiness and wealthy youth. I began to draw in simple strokes, lines, dots. Wow! I seemed to enjoy this kind of activity (not aware that time that it can be a talent). Then I draw people, animals, plants, houses, things outside the house.
Thanks to the great invention, the TV, a black & white screen, signal poor (haha! I remember in my childhood days, our first TV, my papa bought in a second hand appliances store!). After in school, I'll go watch my favorite anime programmes (Especially Sailormoon)! I'm so amazed how those great colored drawings are moving like real people! But what I am really fascinated is the structure and colors of those anime characters.
Now my interest shifted to anime. I tried to draw some posters I borrowed from my classmates (Sailormoon, Dragon ball Z, Yuyu Hakusho,etc.) Oh my God, I never expected but I can copy those posters, and do coloring too! Proudly realized, why have to buy posters and collectibles when I can draw and make my own? haha!
In highschool, I gained so many friends when they discovered my skill (now i'm aware it's my talent). It also helped me earn money! My friends used to ask me draw their favorite anime characters and pay me a little sum of money, such a great help for my school expenses.
Since I began to earn money, I also started to learn making portraits!
I feel so blessed having this kind of skill but I don't stop to make improvements.
Until I discovered this site.
I never knew what Otaku means until I registered. Googled it and found it means a "fanatic", specifically, a manga or anime fanatic! Wow! this is where I belong! I never knew I'm an otaku until I met new friends here! I feel proud with comments, faves and hugs that my works received!
But I forgot something!
I'm a gay!
I'm a homosexual!
One of my fights in life is how to live in a world of discrimination!
Our society promises and pretends to accept changes! But why I can't feel this acceptance?
What about here in the Otaku world? What if my subscribers found out the real me? They might unsubscribe. Or Post offensive comments. They might say the fan arts I post are against to the personality of a homo like me. Shall they still believe in the emotions I want to express in my artworks? That this gay/homo is posting religious, wholesome, and kiddy artrworks! Can I still feel proud to stay here? Most of the members who know my profile didn't know yet about my homosexuality! Only two of them know (they're uzumakixhinata & nica624) about it.
For Now, I still enjoy posting my art works here! I don't want to confuse my self on how people here will react if they found out.
All I know is that I love my self, and God loves me for what I am! He even gave me a bonus for having this kind of talent. But I also think, He gave me a challenge on how to cope in a life of a gay otaku. Maybe, He knows I'm a fighter.
I'm proud!
Like Beyonce sings:
ALL THE SINGLE LADIES!
ALL THE SINGLE LADIES!
NOW PUT YOUR HANDS UP! (^_^? LOL
