Don't Be Stupid

“The turkey?”

“Yeah! He doesn’t have it cooking, but I bet we can figure out a way to use the laser pistol to heat it up and cook it.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“I’ve seen the bums do it. That’s how they cook the fish they catch and stuff.”

“But…how?”

“We put it over some burning wood, duh.”

“We don’t have any wood.”

“Then go get some.”

Where?”

“…Okay, point taken. Um…I wonder if we…Oh! I know!”

“Share please.”

“We just shoot it!”

“But – that’ll – it’s – food!”

“Nono, okay, see, these things aren’t like real bullets – I mean, they can be, ish, but most of the time what they do is they send a shock through the target’s system, disabling their neves. And sometimes it’ll fry the victim!”

“…Ew…”

“It’s so cool! So you know what? Let’s take a gamble, let’s see what happens.”

“Simon, I – I don’t think that’s –”

“C’mon, where’s your sense of adventure?”

“But Russell says that it’s defective or broken or –”

“I don’t see anything wrong with it! Countdown!”

“But –”

“Fine, I’ll do it myself. 3 -2 – 1 – blastoff!”