~Ai~

When Alex said he loved me too I was taken aback. It made me very happy, but it also scared the shit out of me. Flashbacks of Ame kept running through my mind. "I...I want to go back to our room now...please." He nodded. "I had a book I wanted to finish anyway.

When we got back I jumped up onto my bed and curled up. When the springs shifted I felt my fur rise slightly. If I had been human my face would have been red. "W...what are you doing?" He smiled. "You crawled into mine earlier. Call it payback." I muttered as he got situated. "Also...you're very warm in this form. It's cold in these old dorms." My tail wagged in pride at that.

That was when the nightmare started. The same one I always had.

The first time I changed. My parents were yelling at me. I just got home from the hospital after Ame put me in. They thiyght I was in a gang and doing drugs. It made me angry. I always did everything they wanted! I did good in school! What more did they want from me?! A voice that sounded like my own goaded me. "Teach them a lesson. They don't understand you. Just imagine if they found out you are gay! They might send you away. Don't you just hate them?" The voice sounded good. It sounded right. Suddenly everything was tinted red, and I wasn't in control anymore. It was the voice! "No! Stop! Don't do it!!!" It was too late. Blood...fear...death.

When I came back it was over. But everything was still red. Blood red. On the walls...on the floor...and all over me. Slowly the room fadded away. I was sitting curled in a fetal position rocking back and forth. The tears were flowing uncontrollably. My hands...my hands were covered...my parents...dad mom. My mother...my mom...mommy...Mommy I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry mommy!!!

"Ai...Ai!" I jerked awake. It must have been daytime cause I was human again. My body was covered in sweat, and fear stung my nose. I realized it was my fear. "You scared the crap out of me Ai. That must have been some nightmare." I looked down...and noticed my hands. I began to cry again. I missed my parents, but it was my fault I would never see them again.