~Beadsville~

Do you come with a manual?

Watching "The Dog Whisperer" makes me want a doggy even more. IT doesn't help that my brain goes "doggy, doggy, doggy, doggy!" whenever a dog breed I love passes me ;__;

But anyway. I didn't go to work yesterday because I figured it was better to feel well and truly rested so there wouldn't be any more breaks in getting my routine on. Totally worth it. The woman I've been meeting with in connection to the Project said something very sensible about my cold: "You've been living fairly sheltered [from other people and their germs] and now you're thrown into an environment where people are continuously streaming through, so it's not surprising you got sick."

She's dead pleased with my progress, as am I ^^

One thing I've forgotten to mention is a thought regarding the 'future'. Sometime this week I'll meet up with the boss and my internship coordinator to see how they think I'm getting along. If there are no complaints from the boss I'll stay on for an additional 2 or 3 weeks. That's as far as the initial internship period stretches. It can be prolonged but , and here's where my mind has drastically changed since the last time I interned somewhere, this is what I'm thinking:

If they're pleased with how I work after the month is up, then I either want some kind of employment or move on to some other place to intern at, where there's a possibility for a paid position.~

For me to think like this kinda shocked me at first. Like, is this way too cocky an attitude for me to be allowed to possess? xD It's nice to feel so ... focused, though. And motivated. I don't want to be part of this whole confusing/dysfunctional rat wheel of not being "well" enough but also not being "sick" enough, constantly being bounced back and forth between places that end up making it harder to get out of the wheel. I wanna be a free roaming rodent :p

Aside from that, I've decided to take a break from attempting to tackle the mistakes I made earlier on in the organizing process because it makes my brain shut down. Eeeeep >.>;;; Sorry Toots! *grovels* Kisses :3

It was fun fun fun to do, though ^^

Also, about the "progress" on my computer. Dad handed it in Thursday last week and today it's on the way to the repair guys. Hm, I wonder just how "fast" this Priority 1 tag is.

*****

Dagger: It looked like the update list was more encompassing today *rubs chin* Hmmmm....

And yikes about that girl! O.o (Am I horrible for thinking it's kinda cool on some level? >.>)

T-C: Not sure where the bruise originates from ^^; It could've happened on the bus or maybe it was during work. I should carry a note book with me to keep track of which part of my body I injure, so as to keep track of my bruises origins xD;

Are you proud of me for taking an extra day off to recuperate? ;3

Shaow: Your comment made me LOLOLOL!!! Now I gotta look for that face you're seeing *giggles and hugs* Love ya loads, hun ^^

Schultzereen: Actually, School Bus Driver is a completely different subject matter entirely *braids imaginary beard* That species of bus driver is notoriously OK. I, to mentioned just one of many examples, have no bad memories of the ones I met in my childhood :)

To sleep or not to sleep is out of the question

For roughly a week or two I went without any kind of sleeping aid because I ran out, had a cold and couldn't be bothered to ask anyone else to fetch another batch for me, but also due to a never ending curiosity of how my body will react when deprived of something it's used to. My mom rolls her eyes at me every time it happens (yeah that implicates I do this on a semi-regular basis and therefore should know very well how it makes me react >.>) figuring one day the research will stick in my brain long enough for me to not repeat it yet again.

This particular medication (Attarax) does help me to relax enough to fall asleep within a reasonable time frame and, most importantly, it allows me to sleep uninterrupted through the night. But there's also this side-effect of being weighed down by heavy drowsiness the following day, thus it never quite feels as if I've rested, even with the added nap(s) included in the equation.

Occasionally this drowsiness will drift off into a feeling that isn't too far removed from depression. Which I'm not, nor want to be. Lots of fun things have happened recently, I'm fundamentally really positive and looking forward. There's nothing for me to get in that state for, leading me to believe that the medication might not be worth it.

If I'm to choose between sleep or happiness ... then I'd rather hang onto the happiness and instead look for other solutions to my sleeping problems. Such as getting started at the gym, as well as that internship. Activity, in combination with adjusting when I go to bed (hehehehrm), will probably do me a lot more good than depending solely on a pill.

Watching/Listening to music videos such as the one below this post, which my younger sister linked me to yesterday, adds to the determination not to give up too easily >:D

For some reason it reminds me of Jeh O.o