*peeks through* Man it's been a long time since I've been here. (I stalk on here a lot though lol)
Haha, hey everyone! It's been almost three months since my last post here. That has to be one of my top longest gaps on here ever. I usually don't wait a long time to post since this is a really healing place for me to write out my thoughts. But somehow I never got to really write on here, or post wips and etc etc for sometime...
Of course I know you guys are like WTF, or maybe not, but in any case yeah, I haven't been active here at all lately. Though I still read up on postings and such, I really don't do much here. I'm honestly not sure if I want to put in the effort posting up pictures and such any more. Like how I was in the old days, trying to get back into the swing of things when TheO was hot and happening LOL.
I actually took the time to look at the fan art section (like REALLY dig deep into it) and the demographic has shifted quite a bit in the last few years... Like, a lot. I barely see any of the artists that I'm use to seeing and the newer artists here now are quite young, so the experience shows.
Since I was so curious of the lack of recognizable artists I decided to see the most active/popular art in the last year... There was literally 3 artist's art that I saw only. Artists that have been here for years so at least I know everyone isn't gone, but like WTF. Where did everyone go? Of course they went to college, moved on and etc but I'm really missing the community aspect of it all. I'm wanting to jump back into the fray and a lot of my friends and peers are no where to be found.
Honestly, really seeing this, like actually taking it all in is disheartening. I know everyone hasn't up and left and some people still post in their worlds now and again. But I do want to know what they are up to and if they are alive and kicking at the very least. At the same time I've been seeing the downturn happen slowly, I think now has reality stuck. With that being said, I felt that as an artist, I've outgrown TheO for sometime. But now I'm actually questioning if I have "matured" as an artist. Not in skill, but in spirit.
Granted I haven't been drawing like I used to so I feel that in a sense I'm stuck in a certain phrase. From almost 3 years ago... :| I have grown quite a bit as a person in that amount of time. But in my artistic self and life, I think I denied myself to really "move on" to bigger and better things.
Even though I didn't see it then, I see it now. I haven't "truly" moved on and in that resistance of not changing I stunted my own artistic growth. Which makes me very disappointed in myself, but I'm happy that I am able to see where I've gone wrong so I can change.
So I really have to be in the "now," really accept what's happening and move to another community, path, direction or whatever so I can start growing again. I'm not leaving TheO but I won't be posting art here anymore (beside wips and etc in my world). I'll probably spend that energy in my art blog while I find another art site. Though I looked for a few and I haven't found one that I really like. :/ DA is... Fucking DA and I highly doubt I'll be "active" there besides full blown stalking. I'll probably use it for my crafts if anything, but art wise, no lol.
I really like FA, besides the occasional drama and adult content you can wash up on but what site doesn't these days... I just don't want any kind of nonsense going on around me and a small tight knit group I can grow with.
So yeah, that is one of my many shifting tides in my life. I feel like I'm going through one of those "darkness before dawn" type phrases in my life now... *long sigh*
Let me know how you all are doing if you're still around lol, take care!
