Hey everyone,
It’s been a while since I posted but I manage to start drawing a bit more lately. This is one of my more recent sketches.
I also came out as agender on the first of May so I felt like I needed to change my fursona to match this new phrase and person I’ve become. It was fun designing him (even though I’m genderless I refer to this fursona as a boy). It actually helped me to draw more and really get on the ball of doing more with my art and my talent, since I haven’t been drawing like I wanted to for years. But yeah, that’s pretty much it…
*Upcoming rant and lots of cussing, you’ve been warned*
Sooooooo, even though I like to keep my posts here on a positive note, I can’t really speak of this issue anywhere else because it involves to two people that I know too well IRL.
So basically, I’m minding my own business, doing my own thing bringing my bowl down from the upstairs when my sister (who has been drinking) blatantly says that my good friend is a POS (piece of shit). The little back story was that my sister helped my good friend (let’s call him Brad) get a job where she works.
So everything is fine and dandy till apparently Brad quits/leaves or whatever without notice. Being that I’m his friend, when my sister complains to me about him I’m like “yeah whatever,” I don’t want to get in the middle of this. That is what YOU GUYS are doing, don’t involve me.
So back to where I was at, so today she finally gets a hold of him and I guess it didn’t go well because apparently she felt the need to tell ME that my GOOD FRIEND is a POS like I can do something about that. It totally pissed me off because one: it’s FUCKING DISRESPECTFUL TO ME, and two: I HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH IT SO LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE.
So while I’m getting some extra food, I’m still “yeah, whatever” while she bitches and moans about him. I forgot what exactly what we were saying but when I was leaving the kitchen and she was going on about the whole thing she ends up calling me a POS because I didn’t agree with her view.
WELL BITCH, sorry I can’t be on your boat too because YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT MY GOOD FRIEND. I don’t fucking care about the job shit, to me he’s still my friend and outright telling me that he’s a POS isn’t something I’m going to let slide for the second or third time! So I talked back and we got in an argument.
Where she basically is telling me that I shouldn’t take it personally because it has nothing to do with me and shit like that so I shouldn’t get mad. And that she just want to fucking “express herself” to me. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? You’re fucking disrespecting me, talking shit about my friend about a situation that I have nothing to do with as if I can do something about it and/or to expect me to hop to your defense? And when I get offended by that, suddenly: “You shouldn’t take it personally.” On top of being called a POS along with him because I had a different view (before we got into a heated augment)…
This is why I hate alcohol and my family when they drink, they just have this almighty air about them that somehow everything they say and do is right. But what do I expect IT’S DRUNK LOGIC. But moreover, I hate it when someone tells me how to feel (or not to feel) a certain way.
First off, you shouldn’t be telling me anything like that to my face about my friend. All you’re doing is spreading negativity to where it doesn’t need to go. Complain to your friends, fuck, my mom was right there, complain to her. But when I came down and saw her, the first thing she felt the need to say to me is that Brad is a POS. Why say that shit to me knowing I’m his good friend. You clearly wanted me know this “fun fact” out of everyone else at the time. You’re causing fucking drama. What the fuck are you trying to prove saying this shit to me?
Yeah, I took that shit personally and even more so when she called me a POS when I didn’t agree with her. Simply put FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!
On top of that, when I tried to explain to her that she was crossing my boundaries, she insisted that I could do the same with her; to tell her that her friends are a POS. Then she try to defend what she was saying by implying that she was only saying what I once told her when me and Brad had a rough patch.
Totally unfucking fair to bring up something that not only has nothing to do with THIS situation, but about a situation where I was pissed off and angry. It just doesn’t make sense… And I doubt I called him a POS.
So at the end of it all I got really pissed off because I have enough shit on my plate as it is and I ended up smashing my bowl or whatever on the floor and leaving the house.
I can’t possibly put into words how sick I am of my sister totally insisting that she knows exactly who I am, what I’m about and thinks she knows everything. That and this fucking double standard shit that when she does whatever it’s fine but if I do it, it’s not.
She needs a reality check. If I ever came up to her and just outright called her friend(s) a POS, it would be a problem. She wouldn’t be like “oh yeah, I totally agree.” No way in hell even if it was true about her friends, which it usually is. She surrounds herself with POS all the time and complains about it, so I guess it takes one to know one.
Plus, don’t fucking tell me how to feel and how I should react. And don’t tell me that I don’t do the fucking same towards you because I’m mink and timid, that really pissed me off. I don’t say those things because I’m timid (which I’m slowly breaking out of), but I’m not a fucking ass hat. I have enough respect to not say offensive things about people you care about, POS or not.
Go fuck yourself, seriously…
Point being, I wish I can kill people and get away with it because I swear that is what I want to do to my family when they drink and just go full retard for no reason. That and I’m noticing that my patience isn’t what it used to be, I get angry, like real angry faster than ever. It doesn’t sit well with me especially since I’m more bullheaded and I’m not willing to just let people say or do whatever they want to me. I fucking stand up for myself, so maybe it’s shocking for them to see me speak my mind and not hop on her boat just cause they have an opinion… I’m not rude about it either, but obviously when I’m not in agreement with my sister or whoever, that somehow has to mean world war 3.
I can’t fucking stand people sometimes… And a hate having genetic ties to people too. I wish I can be alone forever so I don’t have to hear the bitching and bickering sometimes.
But yeah, sorry for the random, out of the blue rant. It took me hours just to calm down enough to write this and I feel a lot better afterwards too. That’s way I would post here so much because I can simply write about whatever and it would help me clear my head.
But yeah I still have to clean up the chicken stew I hyper beamed all over the floor… Fuck…
