drew's amazing.
andmybestfriend.
what kind of girl would be so obsessed with you me at six and all time low?
that'd be me. i'm that girl. jessica's the name, and lying is the game. but lying's not always the game, i didn't lie about my obsession right there. i am obsessed with atl and youmeatsix. i can name all of all time low's song just by hearing it, and i know most of the songs from you me at six.
oh my. here i am trying to "wow" you with some decent first impression and already you think of me as some lying band obsessed teenager. well, you must know there is more to me then that.
like my swagger. and my legit-ness. it's pretty ghetto crazy.
if you're anybody who knows anything, then you'll know i have a mild case of heffaphobia? halfaphobia? i don't know. but i do know i have an irrational fear of being touched. well, i wouldn't say it's irrational. i'd like to think it's rational. as rational as can be. either way, do not, under any circumstances enter my little bubble. i freak the fuck out. ask anybody who's anybody.
that's not always the case. if i'm comfortable enough with you or i'm just comfortable that day, i won't mind. with some i'm comfortable around them all the time, with others it's an on and off thing.
another thing about me; i'm always smiling. well, at least eighty percent of the time. if i smiled one hundred percent of the time, my jaw would need some serious work.
now, i'm not saying that i'm a saint or anything, because i can assure you i am most definitely not even remotely close to being a saint. i've been called a bitch far too many times, i've already lost track. i've lied so many times in my life, i couldn't tell you what was the truth if it was standing right in front of me. i've been grounded because of my anger issues and my attitude. i swear far too much for a girl my age, and sometimes my parents are ashamed of me.
but i'm alright with that.
now if you really know me, you'd know i'm also kind of philophobic. i don't know how this has happened, i think it's because of the whole touching thing, i'm so afraid of people getting close to me physically, that my mind has convinced my body that i'm afraid of people getting close emotionally.
that's pretty logical, right?
of course it is. at least, that's what i tell myself.
sure i've had infatuations, but never have i been infatuated enough for a relationship. besides, i'm stressed out enough. i don't need a boyfriend stressing me out too. plus there's the fact that i haven't found the right guy.
no, not "mr. right" because i'm well aware that he won't be coming around like, ever. i'm talking a guy who could handle me and my moodiness. or the fact that i might put myself before anybody else sometimes. that i might be a demanding, nagging, bitch, but he'll stay long enough to see through that and actually like me because he knows my perks.
yeah. that's gonna happen.
oh, yeah. i'm currently in middle school, and basking in my free health care. which is highly appreciated with all the sprains i've gotten. which leads me to the subject of basketball.
basketball is the whole reason why i have this darn sprained ankle. the same ankle i sprained two times before. once in february again, from basketball, and another time about maybe three years ago from soccer. but basketball is def my favourite sport there is. but that doesn't mean i dislike all the other sports, i'm up for something different.
i like sports. don't hate.
my mind's always in the gutter. and i am not just saying that, because it is exactly as it is. the truth. not it's not exactly eighty year old pedophile dirty, just the whole, oh, yeah, i'm gonna laugh because i can take that sexually. which is pretty much most of the time.
i'm conceited, but i don't consider myself pretty. i haven't met one girl yet who is so self-centered they go around telling people how beautiful they are. i've only ever heard all of my girl friends saying they're 'hideous'. which is far from the truth. so, i'm gonna be one of those annoying girls and tell you i am full on hideous. even if you may think it's a lie, i refuse to depart from denial.
i like denial. it's like a secure, little blanket. you know, one that's so soft and warm you can't help but wrap yourself up with it. and it's pure ecstasy because it's yours and no one else's. and with that blanket you don't have to face the truth. you can convince yourself of anything and everything. it's tainted bliss. your tainted bliss.
but in this case, it's mine.
i'm opinionated and almost always brutally honest, if you ask for my opinion i won't hesitate telling you the truth. if i don't like something, i'll straight up tell you i don't like something. but twenty-five percent of the time i hold it in. not for my sake, of course. i just don't wanna be a bitch all the time. it's a life choice.
i may not say what i really think of you, but i will think it. oh, i will. if you're reading this now, thinking what a terrible human being i must be, think about this. even if you haven't exactly told people off or bitched and moaned about someone behind their back, you're judging me right now. and you hardly even know me.
everybody judges on first impressions. sometimes even appearance alone. i do it, i'm not gonna lie about that. so you can't sit there thinking i'm a complete liar, also everybody's lied. even if it's a small, white lie. a lie is a lie, no matter how much you like to think that it's not.
me. i happen to be a compulsive liar. and i've been one for years, it wasn't until this year that i've admit it.
you've heard about my many flaws. and just like my flaws i have many perks. maybe you'll get to see them one day, maybe you won't. only time will tell.
now continue wondering how i sleep at night.
Sincerely, the most legit bitch there is :]
Mm, hot damn
Here I come
Tell me how you want it done
At the mall
In the hall
On your momma's bedroom wall
You can choose
Either way you will end up on the news
(Yeah, just like you want it right?)
August 3 2009
Time: 1:08PM
Mood: Meh
Music: Jeffree- Star - Lollipop Luxury on iTunes
I have to admit; Jeffree Star makes a pretty girl. And his music's good. At least, I think so. That's just my opinion.
In three days it's Amby's (Blood Moon Wolf) birthday. So on August 6th I want all of you to wish her a happy birthday. Even if you don't know her. Do it.
I'm pretty bored out of my mind.
I have bedhead.
Becky, my mom said I can go over to your house today.
My dad's keyboard lights up.
He got a new car. I'd make sweet love to it. It's that fucking amazing. And the seats feel awesome.
Seriously.
The new Paramore song -- Ignorance -- is really good. Listen to it.
Do I make you wet?
It's all about the C-U-N-T
(I wanna hear you say)
Love my pink knife
You wish you had a slice of me
I really like that song.
That wasn't Paramore, for your information. That was Jeffree Star. Paramore's lyrics are nothing like that.
I'm gonna go eat my breakfast -- Er, lunch. Brunch? Whatever. I'm gonna go eat.
Byee
Blow Up Dolls &&Wasted Bunnies
xo.xo
Jess <3<3
Time is passing by, you gotta make it through the night,
Until the morning you say "Goodbye, for now darling."
Maybe you will come back, on another day you'll do that,
Go away with the wind,
It takes you now
July 29 2009
Time: 10:51PM
Mood: Content
Music: DCX- Flying High DJ Splash Remix (Speed)
I love techno.
It's upbeat and gets me pumped! Yay for techno!
Sigh, sigh, sigh. I'm pretty bored. Nothing really exciting has happened to me in the past few days. Kinda sucks.
Except the weird dreams. Which I am not going to write about. Because they're personal. And disturbing.
I woman sacked Becca today. That was funny. Would've hurt more if she was a guy. So she better be happy she doesn't have any testies.
Me and Drew have concluded that CSI: Miami is slightly cliched and we both like CSI: NY better.
I haven't hand written for a really long time. I'm going to the mall on Friday with Erin in a limo! Her Uncle Greg has one. Pretty sweet, if I do say so myself.
Mm, I'm still pretty bored.
Entertain me? Please? With a... cherry on top?
I'm really bored.
Bored, bored, bored.
Bored
Bored
Bored
It's 11PM now.
Nothing's happened yet. Another hour 'til Jay's twelve -- Er, eleven. I keep thinking she's twelve.
Oh, well. I'll say she's twelve anyways.
I was at Drew's and Becca's today. Jumped on a wet trampoline and had ice cream. Lots and lots of ice cream. I needed comforting. Which I got! From Drew, Becca, and chocolate ice cream.
My new best friend.
Yummy.
Sigh
Sigh
Sigh
&&Sigh again.
I am really bored.
Serial killers are yummy.
Well, no. Only the ones in movies are.
Sometimes.
FLAVOURED CONDOMS!
Taylor's favourite flavour is banana.
Don't ask me how I know.
It was a sleepover. And we got really bored. And Tay tried on her dad's boxers.
Good times...
I'M BORED!
Life sucks. Hard. And sloppy.
Well, no, it doesn't always suck. But I'm really bored.
I like things with hidden sexual meanings. Or blunt sexual meanings. Or anything sexual. I even like the word sexual.
Don't judge me.
I got high off nail polish and permanent markers with Becca like two days ago.
Good times...
Does anybody know what happens to a girl if she tries Viagra or any time of "extending" pill?
I've been wondering about that for a while, but I've been too lazy to actually search it up.
Yes, I am being a lazy bum.
I'm still bored.
I wonder is any aliens will invade the Earth. That's not likely, but I wish it was. As long as they're friendly aliens that can speak English but choose to speak Mexican so we have to get Mexicans to help translate and it turns out all they wanted to do was try our cotton candy ice cream.
I have an Italian/English dictionary. I'm pretty sure I said that somewhere else in one of my posts.
Somebody fucking entertain me! I'm so fucking bored! I'm gonna start streeeeeeeetching my words.
Because I'm that fuuuuuuucking boooooored.
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBS!
I was gonna originally write bored, but I didn't wannnnna.
TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECHNO!
Fuck yeah.
Mm, still bored.
I wish I had a chihuahua that could do little jigs or something. I wish I was sleeping over at a friend's house. I wish the other side of my window could open so I could sneak out.
But it won't fucking open.
My mom glued it shut after that incident from when I was ten.
Not gonna get into that.
E-N-T-E-R-T-A-I-N M-E!
PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE?
Fuck you, very, very much. Fuck you.
That's a good song. Yees, it really is a song. No, I am not just jooooshing you.
Juice.
Is.
Good.
You know what else is good? Bananas. They are frickin' delicious.
She's a freaky girl.
Fuck is also sex. So from now on; instead of saying fuck, I will say sex.
That movie was so sexing good.
HOLY SEX!
Sex you.
Taylor Lautner is so sexing sexy.
Sex you calender! Sex you to Hell!
No, it's not the same.
It's not the sexing same. So I'm gonna stop.
I wish I had an over sized lollipop.
Whoa!
No I don't.
Li-Li-Lick me like a lollipop.
A 15 inch dick is too long.
Just thought I'd state the obvious.
Don't be a carbon muncher. Unless you're into that kind of stuff. I'm not gonna tell you what that is. Mostly because it's pretty gross.
I'm still bored.
Comment on how much you hate me.
Make me happy :]
Raves &&Raids
xo.xo
Jess <3<3
Should I bite my tongue until blood soaks my shirt?
Never fall apart so tell me why this hurts so much,
My hands are at your throat and I think I hate you,
But still we'll say, "Remember when",
Just like we always do, just like we always do.
July 25, 2009
Time: 3:25PM
Mood: Miserable
Music: Story Of The Year - Until The Day I Die
Sometimes I really do hate being a girl. I've cried so much today and last night. Last night because my dad banned me from my best friends house because of poor cell phone reception. He blames me.
Today because my mom's making me choose who I want to live with if or when my mom and dad get a divorce. And then two more times, one because I'm just overly emotional right now and another because I got really frustrated and just broke down.
But, then again; it was bound to happen. I just didn't think it'd happen so soon.
I really want to get out of my house for a couple of days. I was going to go to this BBQ with Becca, but I couldn't because it's in Steinback. And my dad pulled all the "what if"s on me.
I don't want to live a fucking careful life. Screw fucking careful. Sure, if you're walking on the edge of a cliff, you should be careful. When you're first learning how to skateboard, be careful.
But I wanna take a few risks at least. Shitfuck.
The weirdest band name I've heard; Big Blue Monkey. Story Of The Year used to call themselves that, but then they found out a blues group had the same name. It wasn't changed until 2002.
Yesterday when I was with Drew, Becca, and Maggie there was this guy in a yellow car (Not a very good one, BTW) and he kept staring at us and like, giggling. Then he told his friend, so they were giggling together and just staring.
I was just about to give them my trusty, 'ole middle finger. And Drew was just about to yell "Fuck you!".
My grounding end tomorrow, and so does my debt. Therefore, I will be free to spend my money as I chose and go to sleepovers/ have them. I really wanna rent Haunting In Connecticut then invite Dew and Becca to sleepover then watch it.
We have ice cream. Yummy.
I think I just bounced back. I'm wearing short shorts. Feels good.
I'm off.
Spray Paint &&Pencil Sharpeners
xo.xo
Jess <3<3
Party queen, cause a scene, so ridiculous,
Little dress, maybe less, so conspicuous,
You're falling, who's crashing now?
(Who's crashing, who's crashing now?)
Time: 3:37PM
Mood: Pretty Damn Good
Music: Break Your Little Heart - All Time Low
I love ATL's new album. Hot stuff right there.
I especially love that song. It's like and orgasm in the mouth! Yes, it is that good.
I've started a new story! It's called Strings!
You guys can get a sneak peek because I love all of you that much. It's currently a work in progress, and it's still in my Open Office as a rough draft.
Nobody knew about, except Amby. But she didn't know what was it about. Hell, I don't even know what it's about. Well I do but it's confusing.
Anyways,
Sneak Peek;
She stalked towards him, her eyes taking on a horrifying crimson red. Her teeth grew longer, sharper and her senses changed so she was aware of every detail in this place. She was aware of how loud and fast his heart was pumping, she was aware that his eyes were glued onto her, afraid of what was to come.
Then a loud ringing filled the air, and she sighed, agitated. She slipped her hand into her back pocket, and pulled out a cellular device.
Stupid phone, she thought bitterly. She turned it off, and went back to what currently preoccupied her. The phone that had rang didn't stop her at all. She picked him up off the ground, and with a certain gleam in her eyes, and a menacing grin, his screams filled the night sky.
I'm not gonna paste all of what I've written so far, that's just a snippet. It has to be a little over two thousand words, so I'm still working on it.
I only have like half of chapter one so far, so I still have a ways to go. I've been reading some really great stories on fictionpress, but unfortunately some of my favourite author's stories are being plagiarized.
I don't get how somebody could be that lazy. It's not that hard to think of a story line and write it. Stealing isn't going to get you anywhere.
Some girl even stole one of my favourite author's stories and started to sell it on some website for self publishing. Luckily, she didn't sell any copies. But that one story was plagiarized over five times in one day.
At least give the original author the credit. Jesus fuck.
Plagiarism really pisses me off.
I'm off!
Love you all!
Criticize my story, and make my day!
Demented Kitties &&Possessed Pumpkins
xo.xo
Jess <3<3
50 Facts about ME!
1. I have a phobia for spiders
2. I spazz easily
3. I dislike Twilight
4. I might be having to go through therapy
5. I have a cat
6. I can take picture of myself, but I can't let people take pictures of me
7. I can't live without electricty
8. I say "orgasm" and "orgasmic" a lot.
9. When I was little I couldn't pronounce peanuts, so it came out as penis
10. I have one older brother
11. I'm addicted to the word "FUCK"
12. I'm too attached to my hair
13. Barack Obama is on my speed dial
14. People won't let me handle knives unsupervised
15. I sleep like a fucking rock
16. I'm incapable of acting like a girl for more then a day
17. I love sniffing sharpies.
18. I feel drunk almost 24/7
19. I wanna be a pediatrician when I grow up, or an author.
20. I'm a pervert
21. I say "Lol, Rofl, Lmfao, Lmao, Roflmfao, Roflmao" even if I don't find something funny.
22. I can lie without feeling guilty
23. I have to move my bangs out of my eyes every five seconds
24. I <3 Andy Samberg
25. Some people think I'm bi-polar
26. I wear too many guy clothes
27. "Duty" makes me break out into a fit of giggles. In fact, I just did.
28. I'm very immature
29. I have an OCD for a lot of things
30. I love hugs!
31. MJ was in My5
32. I won't us a straw unless it's colourful or bendy
33. Half my family lives over 1000 miles away from me
34. I'm getting my nose pierced
35. I support gays
36. I have a corner just for my man-whores
37. I like the smell of gas (NOT THAT GAS!)
38. I don't like the taste, smell, or look of blood. But I like the colour!
39. My computer gives me migranes
40. I need a life
41. I've almost drowned
42. I haven't blinked yet
43. I pulled an all-nighter
44. My parents are clean freaks
45. My brother was a clean freak for a full summer. I was out of the house for hours upon hours
46. I can make myself sound like a french Arabian
47. I like writing
48. Me and Brenden are going to go to doctor school together even if it kills us
49. My brother thinks I'm a freak for eating ice
50. I had a fetish for toy cars that actually opened
