THIS IS WHERE I TALK ABOUT THINGS THAT ARE AVERAGE IN MY LIFE. OR RANDOM THINGS IN MY LIFE THAT I THINK SHOULD BE HERE. ENJOY YOUR STAY.

Screw it.

Take a pen and stick it through your chest a thousand times, and you'll know how much I hurt right now. I was fine with the fact that Kyo rejected me. He "with all due respect" declined to go out with me, because there's so many girl problems right now. I was fine with that. But the fact that he needed my best friend to say it to me...THAT hurt me. I spent half of my lunch hour not eating the rest of my ramen noodles, but crying my eyes out because I STILL miss my great aunt and because I feel so hurt by him not having the courage to say no to my face. So I'm now sitting in my Multimedia II class wanting to cry again cuz I don't think I got it all out. And I'm wearing my friend Kevin's jacket cause Kuro completely forgot that he was going to loan me his jacket. And he's never there for me when I need him most. I'm not over him AT ALL...I still love him so much...and I wish he would get those feelings for me back. He told me the reason he wanted me to kiss him was because he thought if he kissed me he could figure out if he wanted to be with me, you know...to see if he liked me the same way, cause he felt like he did. And I wish I could get him to love me again...

So I Lied.

Okay, so in the last post, I said everything was overall okay. Well, I lied. Today, that boy, Kuro, confessed to me that he had feelings for me before. But the other boy who likes me, well. I'm giving him a chance, and Kuro says he's okay with it. But, today, my "friend" Nessie found out that Kavin (the other boy) likes me. After school, when I had missed my bus and went to tell her how stupid I felt for missing it, she just stared at me angrily. So I got serious and asked if something was wrong. She said no at first, but I pryed. I asked her if she was angry with me. So she said, "Yeah, I am." and I asked her why. then she said, while looking very pissed off, "Do I have to remind you of who I liked last year!?" and I replied, "Yeah, probably, cause I don't remember. It's too far back for me." and I was serious. But then she saw her bus and said bye to everyone else but me. And walked off. I can't believe this! She's getting mad at me over a BOY! HONESTLY! When did this woman become so immature to the point of petty jealousy? I didn't have a say in who he liked anyway, so I don't know WHY she's mad at ME! And besides, that was LAST YEAR. So WHAT!? So he likes me, big deal! Does she seriously have to be pissed off at me for it?! I THINK NOT! People tell me that sometimes I'm immature, but in a good way. Because it makes people laugh. She's being immature in the BAD way. She's being childishly selfish, and becoming spiteful towards me all because Kavin likes me. That's a pretty stupid reason to be mad, if you ask me. I don't know what to do anymore! All my friends are turning against me for stupid reasons! And now, I do believe that I may have actually hurt Kuro a little by saying okay to Kavin! For the love of everything good and Holy, why is everything going wrong right now? This is the worst possible time for something bad to happen, but it's happening. The thought of running away has come to my mind, but where will I run? I've nowhere TO run. And running away never solved anything, right? You have to face your fears and your problems, right? And that's what I'm doing! But look at where it's getting me! NOWHERE! Nowhere but stuck in between ridiculousness! I can't stand high school drama anymore, and if I have to deal with even one more thing, I'm going to either die or go insane. TOTALLY INSANE. Not just a little insane to where I can get help. I mean beyond help insane. And I REALLY don't want that to happen. But anyway...just...Tsumi needs to relieve her stress. So...bai bai nao...
~Tsumi