Cyrus: I don't know. But I think that there was another of us controlling us.
Alazne: T_T You made no sense whatsoever.
Cyrus: Was I supposed to?
[Alazne gets behind Cyrus in an attempt to choke him]
[Cyrus turns around]
[Alazne looks innocent]
Cyrus: I might not have eyes in the back of my head but I do have...
MA LAZER!!!!!!!!!
Alazne: Oh, crud.
<Alazne is lazered>
Alazne: <author> Well, that didn’t go well…
Cyrus: Who cares? I'm a psychiatrist?!
Alazne: Wait. You're a psychiatrist? Since when?!
Cyrus: Since I got my degree last April!
Alazne: Oh. That makes sense.
Cyrus: Well at least SOMETHING about your mind isn't messed up. No offense of course.
<Alazne death glares Cyrus>
Alazne: What did you mean by that?
Cyrus: Oh, nothing. It's just that since you're an otaku fan girl, everything
is messed up for you.
Alazne: I AM NOT MESSED UP!
Cyrus: yes you are.
Alazne: Shut up.
Cyrus: No.
Alazne: SHUT THE HECK UP!
Cyrus: Oh look! A ribbon! =^-^=
Alazne: <anime sweat drop> ...Sudden change in attitude...
<Cyrus is playing with the ribbon>
<10 points!>
<no! Not 10 points! OVER 9000 POINTS! YAY!>
Alazne: Uuuuuuh...what?
Cyrus: Ribbon!
Alazne: You need help.
Cyrus: Touche. Ribbon! C'mere, you!
Alazne: <anime sweat drop>
Cyrus: Aren't you a cat, Alazne? Come and chase it with me. You know you can't resist!
Alazne: RIBBON! COME HERE!
<Alazne and Cyrus are now furiously chasing ribbon>
<Enter: Jesus (*), a monster office building with automatic revolving doors, the Terminator, a bunny, the wierd enchantress lady from the world with the fat magic guy, another bunny, the three bears, Santa, George Bush, and the Minotaur>
(*We are not trying to be racist or partial to one religion, in fact, we are both Christian. So to anyone who is offended by this character, we are sorry <bows>)
Jesus: BELIEVE IN GOD AND YOU SHALL BE SAVED!
Terminator: Who do I kill next?
Bunnies: ...
Kiishim: What am I doing here? <leaves>
Santa: YOU ARE ALL NAUGHTY! <to Ikuto and Kurogane> Especially you two.
Ikuto and Kurogane: WHAT?!
Santa: <pulls out giant list, scans for Ikuto and Kurogane's names> Let's see...Ikuto, you are a natural-born pervert and Kurogane, you often went on killing sprees. Naughty, naughty.
Ikuto and Kurogane: ... <furious>
George Bush: I am the president of the United States of America.
Everyone else: Was.
George Bush: I was the president of the United States of America.
Minotaur: <grunts> <tries to tackle Kuro-tan (HEY!)> <misses>
Cyrus: <pulls a Alazne and walks over to the Minotaur and drags him off by his horn>
<Exit: Cyrus and Minotaur>
Papa Bear: <high voice, angry> Where's Goldilocks?
Mama Bear: ...
Baby Bear: <really deep voice> IMMA KILL HER!!!
Everyone else: Woah.
<Cyrus pokes his head in>
Cyrus: By the way, Bush, I am the President of the United States of America.
<Terminator pulls out two shotguns>
Bunnies: <staring innocently at the Terminator> <Roll over happily and fall asleep on Alazne's feet>
Jesus: <fires holy lazars out of eyes at Kurogane> RESPECT MAH HOLY LIGHT, FOO!!!
Santa: <Uses the boost on his sleigh to escape the enemy barrel rolls approaching from the rear>
<Exit: Santa>
<Enter: Cyrus>
<offices doors spinning, without any provokation>
Kurogane: Those things are ticking me off. <starts towards doors>
Fai: Now, now, Kuro-tan what did they ever do to you?
Cyrus and Alazne: No, no, let him try. <look at each other with a glint in their eyes and a mischeivous smile> He'll figure it out.
Kurogane: <gets pwned by the monster office's "teeth"> OKAY, NOW IT IS ON!!!
<A deep hollow sound that sounds like an evil chuckle echoes through the cubicles. On of the Macs explodes, knocking out the wall of the cubicle nearest to Kurogane. The light wall is blackened, except for an area in the middle that wasn't touched. The area spells "BRING IT ON" in jagged capital letters>
Ikuto: That's just creepy.
<Terminator is itching to kill>
Cal: <goading Kurogane> So, little Kuro-puppy, you gonna take this big ol' office building crap, or are you gonna stand up and show us what it means to be a man? Huh? Well? What'll it be?
<The two bunnies are still fast asleep on Alazne's feet>
<You (meaning reader) are staring at the screen, wondering what psycos could have created this thing>
<You read on anyways>
Kurogane: LEMME AT IT!
<charges at the Monster Office Building>
<with on slice, he cuts the building in two>
<You stare at the screen again, wondering if even in a fanfiction world is that even possible>
<You continue reading>
<Fai starts clapping>
Fai: Hyuuu~ Good job, Kuro-Sama! You beat the mean old-
Pretty much everyone else: Door.
Fai: Oh...<stops clapping>
Ikuto: If he only beat the doors, then what about the rest of the building...
<giant roar appears out of nowhere>
<everyone yells>
Terminator: <revvs up guns> I can take it.
Kurogane: <brandishes sword> Count me in.
George Bush: I am the President of the United States of America.
Everyone else: WE GET IT ALREADY!
<You blink, wondering how the Terminator managed to revv up a shotgun>
<The doors melt back into place>
Kurogane: Uh...what?
<Terminator is blowing stuff up. It's all regenerating>
<Kurogane hits his head on the ceiling>
Kurogane: Wait a minute, the ceiling was higher a minute ago.
<Grinding sounds and spars are coming from the edges of the roof of the office's mouth as it lowers>
Cyrus: We are screwed.
<Fai and Kurogane are crouching, the Terminator's metal noggin is punching a hole in the ceiling and the bunnies are still asleep on Alazne's feet. (lol)>
Alazne: <stares at everyone as they are fighting the regenerating building> Uh...guys. Just go through the revolving doors. They can't close shut.
Kurogane: NOW YOU TELL US!
Alazne: Yes I do. Now, HURRY!
<everyone dashes out of the slowly shrinking building via the doors>
<everyone is safe>
Alazne: This is getting annoying beyond measure. <closes eyes>
[Suddenly, there is a small ball of light on her pointer finger. She mouths something and the light grows bigger]
Alazne: Eat this, Monster! <glares> <the light turns into a beam and strikes the building on the 'forehead'>
<he building is destroyed>
Cyrus: When did you learn to use magic?
Alazne: When you became a psychiatrist.
[Out of nowhere, the bunnies start to transform. Everyone watching (minus Alazne) stares in wonder]
[The bunnies are replaced with Arutha and Blaze]
Arutha: 'Bout time we were released. What took you so long? <glaring at Alazne>
Blaze: <hits Arutha on the head> Don't question Mistress Alazne.
Everyone minus Alazne, Arutha and Blaze: WHO ARE THEY?!
Alazne: Let me introduce Arutha - nicknamed Rutha - and Blaze. They are my guardian Shikigami. And for those who don't know what Shikigami are, they are like my guardian angels.
Jesus: I remember assigning you. <looks at Arutha> <slowly walks toward Arutha> <pointing accusingly at him> You were the one who was
constantly getting in trouble. I sent you to her to protect her and maybe keep her out of trouble, too.
Alazne and Arutha: (T.T) That didn't work too well, did it?
Jesus: Not really. <to Blaze> I don't remember assigning you, though.
Blaze: That's because I come from another dimension. I decided to be with Mistress Alazne because she was the only one who could understand me.
Alazne: <smiling> <blushing> Aw, thanks! You were always the nicer one to me!
Cyrus: <absolutely furious> YOU MONSTERS! YOU HURT THE BUNNIES!
Alazne: No, not really.
Cyrus: You may use magic, but I use something so much more powerful!
<time warp envelops Arutha and Blaze>
Cyrus: <cackles> Bye, bye, little guardians! I'll send you some carrots!
<teh bunnehz>
Alazne: You're crazy. And obsessed with rabbits. <turns them back>
Arutha: <to Blaze> We are being manhandled by crazy people!
Blaze: <hits him over the head> Do not call Mistress Alazne crazy!
Cyrus: Not only time, but space too!
<Spatial rift surrounds Blaze>
Blaze: <shrinks> What the...?
<Cyrus's eyes are red with purple irises and no pupils, black lightning crackles around the edges where vessels would be>
Cyrus: <laughs crazily again>
Alazne: Umm...Cyrus?
Jesus: He is possessed!
Alazne: You would say that.
Kurogane: <reminded of the demons of his childhood> I'LL KILL YOU!
<Kurogane charges at Cyrus>
Tomoyo: No! Stop!
<Spatial rift around the angry ninja>
<Kurogane dissappears>
<you are thinking: What the (insert cuss word here) just happened?>
<you continue reading>
Alazne: Uh...Jesus...Do you think you could do something to, oh I don't know, maybe HELP CYRUS?!
Jesus: Oh, right. <waves hand>
<Cyrus turns to normal>
Alazne: Note to self, never underestimate the power of Jesus.
Jesus: YOU UNDA ESTIMATE ME FOO? YA DON'T UNDA ESTIMATE T' POWA O' GOD!
Alazne: Note to self, also tell Father Jack that Jesus acted black.
<Cyrus faints>
Jesus: I pity the foo.
Alazne: Umm... Jesus is white.
Yuko: Sounds black to me.
Syaoran: Guys, guys. Jesus is Jewish.
Everyone: <laughs>
Note to reader: Go onto Youtube and look up 'Tsubasa is a little bit racist'
<Out of Cyrus comes a huge red demon>
Demon: NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF THE QINRIS 'THAL!!!!!!
Jesus: Aw, what the h***?
Qinris 'Thal: <laughs> NOT EVEN YOU CAN MATCH MY POWER!!!
Alazne: Um, Mister Demon, sir, could you please stop yelling? It hurts my ears
and Cyrus here is trying to sleep.
Qinris 'Thal: <embarrassed> Oh, um, sorry about that. I got caught up in the moment.
Jesus: Y'all gotta a way demons, y'know.
Note: Y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
Qinris 'Thal: As I was saying--
Mokona: Yelling.
Qinris 'Thal: As I was yelling--
Tomoyo: It sounded like you were finished a second ago.
Qinris 'Thal: <annoyed> Okay, new subject. You all--
Yuko: Get drunk a lot.
Qinris 'Thal: DOCTOR OCTAMOTHER****INGGONAPUS BLAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Note: Go onto Youtube and look up the Lazer Collection. You have to watch all three.
<You stare at the screen, again wondering what psychos could have created such
a mess>
<And yet for some reason, you keep reading>
<Kurogane comes back>
<You can tell he lost his mind>
Kurogane: <smiling humanely> I love everyone!
<nuclear explosion>
<the screen goes black>
[In reality]
Alazne: <anime sweat drop> Was anyone there sane in the least?
Cyrus: Probably not. So let's see, what went wrong with this time?
Alazne: Well...
- I had cat ears
- You were consumed by a demon
- Jesus was apparently black
- Syaoran actually knew what a Jew is
- I could see my shikigami
- You altered space and time
- Little Bear had a REALLY deep voice
- And Kurogane caused a nuclear explosion causing that world to explode, thus killing everyone in it.
Cyrus: Okay...
Alazne and Cyrus: Let's start another!
[Both get back to typing]
~*~
The End! (*sighs* Finally...)
