I'm so tired. I'm also frustrated with who I am, but the good news is that I'm not frustrated in general. I'm actually really satisfied. Last night I went to a gay club for about an hour all alone, and when I told the guy I like he told me I was really brave for doing that because he said he can never go to gay clubs alone. And I think I'm okay with just being friends with him. He is a good friend.
But anyways, I ordered myself a lot of food and it makes me so happy because I was so angry earlier because I was so hungry. But now it's like I'm on cloud nine. I don't know what to do with myself. So I guess I'll explore my mind.
A few weeks before school ended, one of my teachers told me that I needed to rewrite my past because I was self-sabotaging where I am in life. I was shocked because I had never thought of it that way before, and I didn't think college professors cared all that much. Of course, I go to and live at a small college, so I guess it makes more sense. But she was just so perceptive it was astounding. I told my counselor and she said that is what she does, teaches people to change the way the think. So I guess a cognitive therapist is what she is.
Anyways, so I think I have to start re-evaluating my life. Which is going to be hard. I hope I can do it during this summer. But I want to do it on here, mainly because this is just such a place for reminiscence. So. I guess I should start.