Writing introductions is a bit tedious so....just take a look at my first post if you want to know more....

....and if you get curious about the name of this World or my posts, check out the second one.

Unleash The Beast

I am ridiculously angry right now. Like, seriously, it's ridiculous how angry I am. It's ridiculous that I'm even angry in the first place. It's one of those moments when I really wish my "wifey" or even my "mistress" was still around to talk to (or at least text) at any time of day or night. Just to snap me out of it and calm me down so I can sleep normally. I may have acquired a new "girlfriend" this week, but I think it's a bit soon to be bothering her w/my rage problems so....I write...

You think someone knows you, and then...you think they know how you would react in certain situations, how you would feel about things, not everything, they're not mind readers you know, but you think at least, at least, those certain things that are REALLY NOT OK with you, those things you think they know...

And then you remember they're fucking clueless about everything involving other people.

And that's not the half of it.

I'm much less mad at my idiot big brother (b/c after all, let's face it, he is just my idiot big brother, he can't help the way he is...) than I am at his....friend? drinking buddy? little boy he hangs around with b/c there's no one better in town?

they all fit I guess...

1. Don't talk about me to my big brother to find out if I might let you hang out with me instead of talking to me yourself.

2. DON'T ask him for my email, especially when I've given you like 18 different chances to ask me for it yourself.

3. AND DON'T wait until 11pm to ask him to text me b/c you weren't drunk enough to have the courage before then.

I do not have time for wishy-washy, nervous little boys.

OH, AND (4.) DON'T YOU DARE FUCKING COME TALKING TO ME LIKE WE'RE FRIENDS WHEN NO ONE ELSE IS AROUND AND THEN ACT SCARED OF ME WHEN THEY ARE. IT'S ANNOYING. (Not to mention, it makes you look like a giant loser.)

the girlfriend

I really want to post more (a loooot more) about 冬コミ but I knew I had to get that out of my system...Eh....I'll probably end up texting the new gf about some of it tomorrow if I'm not feeling better when I wake up, but dammit...I really didn't want this kind of headache before bedtime.

The weak are allowed to congregate. I want to be weak. If that's impossible, at least give me someone as strong as I am.

Countdown to the End: 1 (Only Mercifully)

I thought I had nothing to say & then I realized...wait, no, I actually have nothing to say. I just haven't posted any of my Gilbert sketches and since he's the next character I'm working on...yeah....here they are...

...front view...the shape of his face is all wrong, but I was drawing it in a meeting (which I had decided to NOT do w/these b/c I KNOW it lowers the quality) so I guess it's excusable?

...side or 3/4 view...I was trying to draw him in a hoodie b/c he always seems to wear one in doujinshi, but....yeah, not quite right....

I almost fell down the well again last week...but we had a 4 day weekend for me to get my head straightened out again. That was lucky. All 2 day nightmares should be followed by a mandatory 4 day weekend. It's my new rule. In reality, the yearly torture was not as bad as it has been in the past. I got up extra early (& stayed extra late) both days so I wouldn't be stuck on a tiny train w/a bunch of people I hate, took my DS and some Starbucks along, and somehow the time went by faster than I expected it to. When it started feeling slow I just worked on these to keep my mind off it...

...Gilbert, practically the same as the hoodie pic, but w/out the hoodie...I swear I didn't notice till I got home...

...a bit older looking Arthur, didn't have time to finish him since it was the end of the day, and I don't really like that style of eyes...

...pouty Alfred...I'm trying to make him more innocent looking & Arthur more worldly b/c I don't really like the popular fan perception of Arthur as a girly tsundere who cries over everything. Yes, he does get upset sometimes, but...that somehow leads people to draw him looking really effeminate and make Al all suave and predatory which is totally wrong. Hmm...there's a lot more I want to say about that subject, but....I think I should leave it alone for now. If I get started I'll end up talking about things I don't want to just yet.

So, last for today...I got more fanart!

This great drawing of Marco from One Piece is by animesick, please go give hugs here! I seriously don't know why people give me stuff...I don't think I do anything worth getting presents, but I appreciate them all the same!

I am me no matter what others say. This is the proof of my strength.

Winged Eagles

I went rollerblading today. I haven't been in a while, but it's not so hot now so I don't have to worry about my skin breaking out in all kinds of itchy weirdness. Once I do it, I always wish I was doing it more. It's one of those Newton's law things again, I love skating, I always have, but I love other stuff too and it's hard to do something that's not a part of your routine. OK, I'll admit my decision to go today (and at least once a week for as long as it's not too cold) is partly b/c of the nurse at my health check freaking over my blood pressure. After checking it 3 times she was convinced that it had less to do with my panicking over them taking my blood, and more to do with me being generally unhealthy, despite looking perfectly fine. Which I probably am, malnutrition born fingernail ridges and all...and, I'll admit she might be right. Also, I'm not quite sure I'm skinny enough to do a good job on the character I want to cosplay at 冬コミ. I'm not saying who it is yet, but I think based on the kind of stuff I've done in the past, people will be surprised by this one.

So I went out, ignoring the old ache in my knee that has come back with a vengeance thanks to the mild weather, Linkin Park and Owl City shuffling on my iPod, basketball player mouthguard that's supposed to keep me from losing my front teeth (again) making it impossible to sing along. I forgot to count songs so I have no idea how long I was out, but it's ok. It was a while I'm sure. I couldn't really fly like I like to for most of it, the blocks are too short and there's a car coming around the next corner at least 50% of the time, but that's ok too. They're always repaving the roads in Shizuoka and it's awesome when I find that one in my neighborhood has been done when I wasn't paying attention. Those are the best places to just ignore the old people loitering and staring and skate up and down the same block over and over, faster and faster. At times like that though, I really miss my dad's old neighborhood. Rich, suburban, sunny, north-central Florida. Miles and miles of clean, wide road with nothing lining it but big houses and green green grass. No railroad tracks or stoplights or random factories making who knows what with big trucks coming out of them.

(No, I'm not cosplaying Sakura, she's like....10 years old, it would look ridiculous. That's a rollerblading picture you idiots.)

Last weekend Hachi and I finally saw the Gundam00 movie. I say finally, but really it had only been out for a week at that point. Still, fans should go the first day! We had a good reason for waiting though. We managed to get tickets to a special showing at which the director and 5 voice actors (the 4 main pilots and Graham Acre!) would appear live after the movie to talk to the audience. (For only $2 extra!) I'm not super obsessive about any of the voices in 00, but it was cooler than I expected. Two of them seemed really smart, which impressed me of course. Setsuna's voice actor was kinda young and it showed in his responses to the moderator's questions, but it was cute in a way. They talked a lot about the message of the movie and what they hoped people would take from it, and it seemed like they all really believed in it.

sign announcing the event at the theater

they had all 4 meisters lined up, but...yeah, I just wanted him...

Alleluia's voice actor seemed kinda cold, but I don't really like his voice so much anyway, just his personality(s). The movie itself was really amazing though. So much so that I might just have to go again. There were some parts where I kinda missed what people were talking about due to being fascinated by the flashy space battles (hey, it's gundam, what do you want from me?) The message was really good though. Also, there were aliens! And that's something different from any gundam movie or series to date. At first I wasn't so cool with it, but as the movie went on it became obvious why they did that. I think I like Setsuna's character a bit more after seeing it too. Not that I didn't like him before or anything, I just liked Hallelujah and Alleluia best. I still do, but...yeah, I can relate to Setsuna more now. I remember being impressed during the TV series run by how current the issues seemed despite being a space drama set 300 years in the future. I had that feeling about Seed & S. Destiny when they were on 5 or 6 years ago too. Looking back, I expect Wing, & the first Gundam series (as well as it's follow ups Z and ZZ) were probably the same for their time. Anyway, this movie did a great job of sticking to that theme.

Funny, I saw that movie just before getting the new Linkin Park album and now I can't help but think it was for a reason. Eh...it's probably just a coincidence, or one of those weird connections that I make in my head due to circumstances, but....yeah, the message is almost the same. It's pretty fucking awesome actually. I really like watching (hearing?) a band "grow up" and they certainly have. My brother said people were comparing this album ("A Thousand Suns") to Nine Inch Nails's "The Fragile" or Radiohead's "Kid A". I don't know about all that, but I do know they're trying to say something big. It's impressive when a band can make an album that really says something. Not to say that if your album doesn't then you've failed or anything, of course musicians say things with their songs all the time. They tell stories with them and make people feel things, and it's really great, but it's one thing to write a song that means something, and then put it on a cd with a bunch of other songs that mean something and have a collection of meaningful songs. It's another thing entirely when all those songs that mean something, when put together in the right order mean something more. One of those "the whole is greater than the sum of all it's parts" kind of things. Uh....it sounds cheesey now that I write it out...but anyway, the point is it's one of those albums that's meant to be listened to from start to finish, as a whole, not just for the "good" songs that occur between the "just alright" ones.

...hold on, the weight of the world will give you the strength to go...