SETTING: A Medieval dungeon occupied by three men dressed in red.

A jarring chord plays.

MAN 1: Do you feel like you could be doing something more with your life?

MAN 2: Do you enjoy experimenting with methods of cruel and unusual punishment?

MAN 1: Do you take pride in showing up when others least expect it?

MAN 3: Then come and join the Spanish Inquisition! Amongst our weaponry are such diverse elements as fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope, and nice red uniforms!

MAN 2: Oh yes, very nice.

MAN 3: You shall learn about such staunch methods of torture as the drying rack, cushion-poking and for the most eager recruit… the COMFY CHAIR!

Man 2 and Man 1 gasp as the jarring chord plays again.

MAN 3: So if you want to join up with us, then send in to “The Spanish Inqui…”

Man 3 stops himself short as Usopp dressed in his purple cloak and red feathered hat from Thriller Bark appears.

USOPP: What are you doing?

MAN 1: What does it look like we’re doing?

MAN 2: Yeah, what does it look like?

USOPP: Doing a very bad recruiting pitch that is making the writer of this monstrosity look horrible.

MAN 3: We are…?

USOPP (pelting men with garlic cloves): YES YOU ARE!

A fight between Usopp and the men breaks out, knocking over the camera and forcing the screen to go black, though not early enough to save the author’s reputation as a Python fan.