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Sad Songs on the Radio

Sun Sep 20, 2009, 8:58 PM

* Mood: Confused
* Listening to: "What Went Wrong?"-blink-182

I'm supposed to be over it. Why am I so crushed? I let him take over my life back then, and now I'm paying for it. His ex is now his girlfriend for the 50millionth time and now even though he's my best friend I can't even talk to him because she hates my guts.

Why did I even tell him those things? Why did I let him take everything? Why am I so upset about such a stupid person? Why even get annoyed by it? He's just a best friend. That I loved. From middle school And things happened over the past 4 years. He's not worth it. He was so much trouble. I can have a pick of basically whoever I want, I shouldn't be upset because he said things that usually don't happen. I shouldn't have believed him in the first place.

Why won't this all disappear? I keep letting feelings get in the way of things. It's nothing to kill myself over. I know the logic. The smart thing to do would be to drop everything related to him. But I know I won't. And I know he's gonna pop up at the least expected time again at my school or something and give me those eyes; then when my guard is down, those feelings I managed to put away will come leaking out for the millionth time, and things will start up again. Because I can't let go of things. I can't let go. I gotta chop my hands off.

Sorry for the emo-ness; I'm venting.

-KF

Serial Cat Killer in Miami, Fl

Wed Jun 10, 2009, 8:16 PM

* Mood: Mortified
* Listening to: "Bury Me In Black"-My Chemical Romance

Apparently since May, there's a serial cat killer going around Miami killing pet cats--skinning and gutting them--and leaving them on the owners' lawns...So far about 25 have been killed. There's a reward for turning the guy in, about $2500-$3500(the number and reward depends on what article you read), but I think it should be more. Is it a Satanist? I dunno, I just hope he won't decide to go to more animals humans or to other cities/towns in Florida...this state just keeps getting better and better DX Poor cats...*looks at own cat*

And for my own sick humour, it reminded me of Final Fantasy Tactics--there's a bounty on this person's head. If I was in the FF world, I would totally be a bounty hunter. As for my brother's sick humour, he said he kind of understands if the cats were in heat... =D/D=

Here's a link from one of the local newspapers-Palm Beach Post Website
-KF

Fustration

Mon Mar 30, 2009, 6:28 PM

* Mood: Regretful
* Listening to: "I'll Find Mine"-Meg and Dia
* Eating: I'm pretty sure I ate something...

You know how when you turn on your computer, there's these automatic updates that are really annoying cuz they just keep popping up? Yeah, I miss those. I'm grateful for this laptop, cuz I hate sitting at a desk-but I wish this Mac was newer; it's so old, I can't even update. It was a high school graduation gift for my brother. He graduated at 19-he's 24 now. It kills me; I try to update things or get some nice applications(like the GIMP) for me to use, but the version they offer start at version 10.4-I'm 10.3.9. It's like when you're just so close from getting the next letter grade up and your teacher just decides to leave it as it is...pisses me off.

My technology is limited to a pencil, paper, magic rub erasers, and a light table. My mom's laptop is fried, so I can't use the scanner-and my brother is too lazy for favours, especially since I already filled up another sketchbook. Then there's the lack of motivation cuz of other complications going on in my life...I'm a skinny li'l kid, but I'm starting to feel fat because ever since break started the most exercise I've had is a 30minute session of DDR on heavy, and that was just to relieve some steam from said complications...I probably gained a pound or two...now I'm lacking the motivation to move...I haven't been eating as much as I used to, either(I usually never stop eating, now I can't remember what/if I ate today).

Anybody know how to fix this? forget my personal problems, but I don't wanna become a jell-o mold D= FIX ME!!! DX

-KF