Writing introductions is a bit tedious so....just take a look at my first post if you want to know more....

....and if you get curious about the name of this World or my posts, check out the second one.

The Wrath

WARNING: Spoilers!! Do not read if you:
A. Read Naruto and are not caught up to the Japanese manga
B. Are planning on reading Naruto someday and don't want the story ruined for you
C. You've never read or seen past the 4th installment of the Harry Potter saga and want to

That being said, I'll still black out the really important stuff.

I hate Sasuke. Sure, I just drew him, and he looks cool, but that was a request by a kid I really like. I couldn't just do a bad job on it. Anyway, I've never been a big fan of him, or characters like him in any story for that matter. I can see the appeal of say, Ichimaru Gin, or Mukuro, or hm.....can't find the Naruto equivalent at the moment, but anyway....I can see the appeal of the smooth villain. I don't like them, but I can see it.

I hate Sasuke because he makes people like him. Girls loooove him in fact. And he's basically just an asshole. He's concieted, rude, heartless, and doesn't give a damn about using or hurting people. It's becoming more and more evident that Naruto won't be able to redeem him in the end like he's done for so many other characters. Despite Sasuke being his "best friend" and the one he wants to save the most. Sasuke's going to have to be killed by Naruto in the end.

But I swear to all that is holy or evil or anywhere in existence if Sasuke kills Kakashi I will be in a bad mood for at least a year! When Kakashi was "dead" for a while during the Pain arc I was soooo out of it I didnt't even realize what was going on. I considered giving up reading the manga altogether, but........well, I have to know the end of the story!

I've heard arguments made before that Naruto in some ways parallels Harry Potter. Or that there are similarities between the main characters' lives anyway. When Sirius was killed off I was pretty furious. Actually, no wait, I'm still furious! Anyway, when it happened (or maybe it was after Dumbledore was offed in the 6th book...) there was this essay that went around saying Harry had to have all his supporters stolen away from him so he could stand up to Voldemort on his own. That's all fine and good, but........with Jiraiya being dead, and Kakashi having scraped by once... things seem to be heading that direction for Naruto too. And I'm not cool with it.

Not one bit.

It seems I have a thing for guys who like to get themselves killed for a "good cause".....

The Pride

A while ago I posted this piece of fanart. I finally got to see "Tori-chan" again last weekend to give it to her. She wrote about the event on her blog. Go ahead. Click it. And scroll down. Yeah, that's my Kakashi drawing there w/the chocolates (the ones in the light pink box are the ones I gave her.) If you don't read Japanese & are wondering, most of the entry just describes her day at the event. About the 6th paragraph down it talks about me, and says that she's never gotten that kind of present before and how she was really happy about it. Because I'm just that awesome.

She's drawn Kakashi for me before, and did Iruka this time, but I don't have photos of them. Or rather, I didn't take photos of them. The drawings in that sketchbook aren't for sharing. They're just for me, not for internet pirates. But she also gave me the snacks (the bag that says "Kittyland") in the bottom right of this photo...

...the other stuff (chocolate & a freezer pack) was door prizes at the event. This might have been my favorite one yet.

Tell your Children the Truth

My dad's getting married. I don't particularly want him to, but I know I don't really have a say in the matter, nor does it affect me in any way. My brother doesn't know. It's kind of killing me to not be able to call him right now.

My mom was always honest w/me as a kid. Or rather, she was straightforward. She told me quite a few lies I'm sure, but most of the time she told me things the way she thought they really were. She acted towards me, & told me, kids are no different from adults. It's not a common practice. Most people would probably say it's a bad idea in fact. I'm definitely warped in some ways because of it. For one thing, I think it's the right way to go about things now too. I can't do them any differently.

I've been posting a lot recently. I guess it has to do with thinking a lot. When I don't spend all day focusing on my little kids things creep into my head a bit too easily. I really hate being looked down on by people. I always have, not just since coming here. I guess it's kinda funny since I automatically tend to look down on everyone myself, but.....yeah, it's not cool. Often times, I get the feeling people are talking to me like they would a very slow child, because they assume I won't understand the words they're using. And if I don't answer immediately - b/c I usually don't know what to say, & wouldn't whether they spoke English, Japanese, or Swahili for the simple reason that I never know how to respond to people - they automatically assume they're right & I just don't know the literal meaning of the words. When really, what I don't know is the meaning of the conversation, why they're telling me that crap in the first place, and what the hell they expect to hear.

...if it looks like I'm laughing I am really just asking to leave...

Goodbye, Halcyon Days

Winter vacation's over. And that means back to teaching jr. high kids for me.

The school I got actually isn't that bad, but.....still not like elementary. I was telling a friend of mine tonight that I thought the kids there were all pretty nice, & he said, "Then that's all you need." And I thought, um...no, it's not. The kids are never really a problem. Sure there were a few that I really didn't like at 2 of the 4 schools I was stuck at, but for the most part, even the ones I wasn't fond of I didn't mind. I like kids. Obviously, I wouldn't have been working with them this long if I didn't. It's the adults that make me crazy. It always has been. No matter where I was living. I've never had patience for adults. They always over complicate things with their confusion. I don't mind the ones at this school so much for some reason though. Possibly because of my "New Year's Resolution", or possibly b/c I remembered something about myself over break. Although, one of those was really caused by the other anyway...

Winter vacation was pretty awesome now that I think about it. Besides "Mitchiko E Hatchin" I watched a ton of Naruto, read all of Kuroshitsuji, started reading Tegami Bachi, & got caught up on all the stuff I normally read & watch that had fallen behind since the last few weeks before break were too stressful for me to think about them. It reminded me of the spring and winter vacations of the few years before I came to Japan. Nobody to take care of. Nothing to worry about. Nowhere I was needed. Watching Naruto made me want to watch it all from the beginning again. For like, the 8th time. It made me even more connected to my "Kakashi-side" again too. Not to say that my "Hayato-side" is lessening or anything, but he is a bit of a kid after all.

I'm still finding strange gaps in my language patterns. It's possible that they were always there & it's not even related to the English/Japanese thing. In fact, it's quite likely that's the case. While I'm good at spinning words around, I'm absolutely terrible at actually saying anything. And probably it's always been that way.

...and you're walking away, and I will drown in the fear...

Fang & Sting

I am done with Naruto. If Kakashi is dead I'm not reading it anymore.

This weekend was Halloween. It's my favorite holiday and I didn't celebrate it at all. I think I felt the same way last year at this time, but I'm rather unfulfilled here lately. Sometimes I look around and think what am I doing? I go to work, I go out, I sit on the internet. It's no different than when I lived in the US. It's not because I don't have it good here, it's much better here than anywhere else money wise, friend wise, health wise....you name it, it's better in Japan. It's no different here, because I'm no different. All this time I've sat around thinking I'm getting stronger and I can do things, but I can't. There are things I want to do that everyday I tell myself I will do, and yet I don't.

So right now Beth and I are talking about being in a rut. I've thought of a good analogy. When you're looking up from the bottom of the well the walls are steep and slick. It seems impossible to ever escape from that deep hole of misery. What you don't realize is that if you'd just stop trying to scale the slimy walls and look behind you, you'd see the door that leads to the marble staircase up and out. Easy as pie. I never got myself into a situation I couldn't get myself out of.